אל תתעלם מלמד את אשתך

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Shaykh Muhammad Moosaa Nasr mentions:

The Prophet’s (ראה) endeavor for his family used to be such that he would command them with all good (1), influence them with all good, encourage them to all good and this is what is obligatory upon the husbands.

A lot of the Muslims today, especially amongst the callers to Allaah, and all of us are tested by it, with sincere regrets, fall short in our duty to our household (2). A lot of them abandon their children and busy themselves with the people more than they do with their own children.

And what is proper for the caller to Allaah and the students of knowledge is that they give importance to their wives and children. It is a defect, shame, and dishonor that the son of a righteous person or a caller to Allaah or a teacher does not memorize from the Book of Allaah nor understand a thing from the Deen of Allaah. And that a wife of a scholar or a caller to Allaah or a student of knowledge is amongst the most ignorant of women.

And what is proper is that he influences his family and his children with good and knowledge.

Allah says:

“O you who have believed, הגן על עצמכם ועל משפחותיכם מפני אש שאת הדלק שלה הם גברים ואבנים. " [20:132]

The shaykh then goes on to mention:

A person must influence his family with good. He should strive to develop and train his family. If you were to abandon your wife and children then who will turn to them? Who will come from outside the home to teach and guide them? הנביא (ראה) אמר:

“Everyone of you is responsible for something and everyone of you will be asked/questioned about his responsibility.” [Bukhaaree & מוסלמי]

[Taken from “הנביא (ראה) At Home” by Sh. Muhammad Moosaa Nasr, Pp. 32 & 34]

Footnotes:

(1) הנביא (ראה) אמר, ”Whoever calls people to the truth will have a reward like that of those who folow him, without it detracting in the least from their reward.” [מוסלמי] הוא (ראה) גם אמר, ”By Allaah, if ALlaah were to guide just one man through you it would be better for you than red camels.” [Bukhaaree & מוסלמי]

One of the methods of wise, intelligent da’wah is to be gentle with the people one is calling, and to show patience towards their ignorance, mistakes and many tedious questions, and their slowness in understanding.

(2) Hushaim Ibn ‘Urwah reports that his father said: “It used to be said, ‘The most withdrawn of people from a scholar are his family members.‘ ” [The Book Of Knowledge, by An-Nisaa’ee, #91]

Furthermore when Ibn Al-Jawzee was 80 שנים, he would study knowledge together with his son and did not return from Wasit until he and his son (who was also his student) completed reciting the Quraan in the ten ways in the presence of Ibn Al-Baqillaanee. [Thail Tabaqaat Al-Hanaabila, 1/427]
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