Praeclari mores cum uxoribus suis ( Vita coniugalis )

Source :Desumptum ex libro 'Viae sancti Mohammad prophetae' (Pax sit super eum ) per D. Abdul Hai Arafi’
The Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) was scrupulous in maintaining a treatment of justice and equity towards his wives without making any discrimination among them. But so far as love is concerned, he used to say: "O Allah! All things over which I have control, I have divided equally among them. But do Thou not condemn me for that which is beyond my sway.” (By the former were meant social obligations and by the latter love and attachment).

The Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) resorted to divorce also but withdrew it. He also exercised El’a (Vow for separation from a wife for a certain period) so far as his wives were concerned.

His way of living with his wives was the best model of decency and excellent manners. He would rest against the knee of Hadrat Aisha and would also recite the Holy QURAAN in this position. Sometimes it so happened that when she was in menstrual period, he would still associate with her even when he was fasting. All this was the outcome of his kindness and graceful manners to his wives. When he proposed to undertake a journey, he would draw lots between his wives and whose name was drawn would then accompany him. Thus no one would have reason to grumble.

The Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) used to say: The best among you is he who treats his wife best. My behavior with my family members is best of all of you.

Every day after Asr Salaah, he used to visit his wives. He would sit with them, inquire about their health and other matters. At night fall he would go to the wife whose turn it was and pass the night there.

Hadrat Aishah (Radi Allaahu Ta’ala Anha) narrated that he was so particular in observing the turn that he never gave preference to one over the other. It seldom happened that he failed to visit his wives every day. Hadrat Safya (Radi Allaahu Ta’ala Anha) once said to Hadrat Aisha (Radi Allaahu Ta’ala Anha). If you can win the favor of the Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) for me, I shall gladly yield my turn to you’. She agreed and accordingly went to him on the day of Hadrat Safiya’s turn. Interrogavit, Aisha! How is it that you come today? Go back it is Safiya’s turn. Respondit, It is the favor of ALLAH. He bestows it on whom He will: and related the whole story. The Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) was thus conciliated with Hadrat Safiya.

The Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) used to visit his wives at anytime during the nights, in the early hours as well as in the last hours, Sometimes he used to go to sleep after taking bath and sometimes after wudhu only.
The Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) used to invite girls from the Ansar to play with Hadrat Aisha and he also joined them in allowable matters. As and when Aishah drank water, he would take the cup from her from which she had been drinking. Similarly when she chewed meat from a bone he would take the bone and chew the remaining portion beginning from the very point from which she had been eating.

It is related that once he competed with Hadrat ‘Aishah (Radi Allaahu Ta’ala Anha) in a race and both of them ran together. Hadrat ‘Aishah won the race. After some years, they ran together again. This time theProphet won. The reason was that on the first occasion, Hadrat Aishah had normal body, but on the second occasion she had grown bulky. The Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) dixit, ‘By winning today, I have equalized your winning before. [Madarij-un-Nabuwah]
On occasions when the wives of the Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) told tales or narrated past events, he listened attentively and at times, he mentioned events from his own life. Hazrat Aishah (Radi Allaahu Ta’ala Anha) narrated: “He used to sit amongst us talking and laughing in such a way that we would not feel that he was a resolute prophet. But if some religious issue cropped up or it was time for Salaah, then he appeared to be a different man altogether.

There was no restriction on the wives in the matter of eating and wearing. They ate and wore whatever they liked, though due to hardcircumstances wholesome food was not available. The Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) did not like gold or silver ornaments for the members of his family. In those days, ivory trinkets were in vogue. He advised the wearing of such ornaments. He desired his wives to remain neat and clean. He never reproached them nor even addressed them in a harsh or disagreeable tone, if there was anything to his disliking.

Hadrat Aishah (Radi Allaahu Ta’ala Anha) has related that the Holy Prophet (Salllallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam) would enter the house with a pleasing disposition and a smile on his lips. [Uswa-e-Hasana]

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Source :Desumptum ex libro 'Viae sancti Mohammad prophetae' (Pax sit super eum ) per D. Abdul Hai Arafi’