यो साझा गर्नुहोस्
_______________________________________________________________________________________: Zohra Sarwari
Biscellaharir राहुरी र तिताउनु पाठ,
यस विषय भनेको इस्लामको सट्टा हाम्रो संस्कृतिमा हुर्केका धेरैका लागि एउटा टेलिक विषय हो - र यसले सधैं ठूलो भएको बारेमा सोच्दैछ, असाधारण विवाह जुन धेरै पैसा खर्च गर्दछ. विवाह गर्न तयार छ जो एक भन्दा कम केहि छैन $50,000 विवाह. यसमा एक महँगो होटेल समावेश छ, विवाह पहिरन, गायक, केक, Tuxedo, दुलहीको दाँत ड्रेस, पुरुषहरूको लागि टक्सिडोस मिलान, हावाका फूलहरू, लिंगीइन, सूची, पार्टी सहयोगीहरु, आदि. त्यसैले कुनै भाइले एक बहिनीको हात माग्नु पर्ने हो भने उसले कि त उसको पैसालाई विवाहको लागि तयार पार्दछ वा संलग्न नभएसम्म संलग्न रहन्छ. आजकल, उसले भर्खर क्रेडिट कार्डको गुच्छा प्राप्त गर्दछ र उसको विवाहलाई त्यस तरीकाले भुक्तान गर्दछ.
सबै त्यो हो साच्चिकै "म गर्छु" भन्न आवश्यक छ?"यसको बारेमा सोच्नुहोस्.
अगमवक्ता (Allah Allihi वाल नुसीलाई धन्यवाद) भन्नुभयो
“जब आहिले विवाह गर्दछ, त्यसपछि उसले मर्यो को आधा पूरा गरेको छ. त्यसो भए उसलाई अलज्याक गरौं (Taqwa) बाँकी आधा को सम्बन्धमा”(Saheeh ul-Jaami No.443333)
तपाईंलाई थाहा छ जब युवाहरू उनीहरूको मध्यमा साझेदार किशोरहरूमा युवा वयस्क हुन्छन्, तिनीहरूले विपरीत लि gender ्ग र विवाहको बारेमा सोच्न थाल्छन्. तिनीहरू मध्ये धेरै विवाह गर्न चाहन्छन्, तर आर्थिक दायित्वका कारण जुन एक महँगो विवाहमा बाँधिएको थियो उनीहरू सबैमा विवाह गर्दैनन्. आफ्ना भावनाहरूलाई दबाउन सक्षम नभएको कारण, र प्रतीक्षा, तिनीहरू मध्ये धेरै बिपर को विपरीत लि gender ्गको साथ हुनुको बारेमा हुन्छ. Others just sit and wait until the perfect brother comes along who will have everything she wants in him, along with the big wedding check. This leads to sisters waiting until they are almost 30 to get married, and then they end up with either a small wedding party anyway or no wedding party at all. Why? Because now they just want to get married and settle, and they don’t care anymore.
So how do we keep everyone happy? Simple – follow the way of the Prophet Muhammad (Allah Allihi वाल नुसीलाई धन्यवाद) and Insha’Allah there will be no problems.
What Is A Marriage In Islam?
- In Islam a marriage is solemnized by a nikah – this is a marriage contract. After the nikah the marriage should be consummated, and then the couple should have a walimah- which is a dinner to celebrate the marriage- this is done to let others know about the marriage inshAllaah.
- The walimah is a simple dinner to celebrate the marriage. You make food, or cater it out. Then you invite everyone to let them know you’re married now. This event can be held in your home, back yard, a park, masjid, community center, or a hall. This is the one event everyone thinks has to be BIG. Well let’s see how the Prophet (Allah Allihi वाल नुसीलाई धन्यवाद) did it.
अनास (RA) describes one of the walimah’s hosted by the Prophet (Allah Allihi वाल नुसीलाई धन्यवाद):
“The Prophet stayed for three days at a place between Khaibar and Medina, and there he consummated his marriage with Safiyya bint Huyay (RA). I invited the Muslims to a banquet which included neither meat nor bread. अगमवक्ता (Allah Allihi वाल नुसीलाई धन्यवाद) ordered for the leather dining sheets to be spread, and then dates, dried yogurt and butter were provided over it, and that was the Walima (banquet) of the Prophet (Allah Allihi वाल नुसीलाई धन्यवाद)." (Reported by Bukhari)
Now there is nothing wrong with having a nice walimah, however it should be according to how much money the groom has. The groom should not have to go into debt due to having a BIG walimah.
So how do we keep our marriage simple?
- Have only the immediate family at the nikah.
- Make a list of the immediate family and friends that you want to invite to the Walimah.
- If you financially do not have the funds to invite all of those people for an entire meal, you should just have cake and tea for everyone. यद्यपि, if you have the walimah at a park or a free location, then inshAllaah ordering food or cooking for 100 people should not cost too much inshAllaah.
- On many occasions people make their Walimah a potluck. Every family brings a dish and this way everyone shares in the cost and it helps the bride and groom.
निश्कर्षमा, my dearest sisters and brothers even if you have the finances, do not waste it on a BIG walimah, instead give some to the poor. Maybe send money to a charity organization and let them make a feast in a poor country and feed them as a gift to your selves. Subhan’Allaah imagine the good deeds that you’ll get, ईश्वर इच्छा. Another thing you can do with the money is pay for another couple to have a walimah and get married who are too poor to do it. अन्तमा, spend the money on better uses for yourselves. Maybe the two of you can go to Hajj, Umrah, buy a house interest free, आदि.
You can contact sister Zohra Sarwari via her website: www.ZohraSarwari.com
शुद्ध विवाह
….Where Practice Makes Perfect
तपाईको वेबसाइटमा यो लेख प्रयोग गर्न चाहनुहुन्छ, ब्लग वा न्यूजलेटर? तपाईंले निम्न जानकारी समावेश गरेसम्म यो जानकारी पुन: प्रिन्ट गर्न स्वागत छ:
मुहान: www.PureMatrimony.com - मुस्लिम अभ्यास गर्ने विश्वको सबैभन्दा ठूलो वैवाहिक साइट
यो लेख मन पर्छ? यहाँ हाम्रो अद्यावधिकहरूको लागि साइन अप गरेर थप जान्नुहोस्: https://www.muslimmarriageguide.com
वा गएर आफ्नो आधा दीन इन्शाअल्लाह फेला पार्न हामीसँग दर्ता गर्नुहोस्: www.PureMatrimony.com
जहाँ म भित्र छु, वालिमाले दुलही र दुलहा र दुलहीको लागि मात्र घटना होइन तर अभिभावकको लागि पनि. म चाहन्छु कि म केवल साधारण र वालिमाले मात्र व्यक्तिहरूको लागि संगठित गर्न सक्दछु जसले वास्तवमै प्रतिभाशाली परिवारहरू जस्तै महत्त्व दिन्छ. तर यो एक परम्परा हो कि म “राख्नु” गर्नु पर्ने, मेरो आमा बुबाको प्रतिष्ठा कहाँ छ. एक सानो एक हुनु मान्छे कुरा गर्न हुनेछ…केहि म यो संस्कृतिमा मन पराउँदिन. मेरो मुटुमा, यो मेरो आमा बुबा को खातिर के गर्न को लागी केहि हो. अल्लाह हामीलाई मार्गदर्शन गर्न सक्छ.
दुःखको कुरा मा दु: खित पुरुष संस्कृति DIKAHA Buka seb sega sea d ga ga ga ga ga gawne !! गुयज परिवारले धेरै ppl dehy nd dd dd dd dd drey de वामीमा लिन सक्छ जुन सायद हार्दिक छ 1/4 खर्च वा निखा !! केवल धेरै ppl ppl r आमन्त्रित गरियो .. PPL जो अल्लाह swt swt swt sot गर्न पनि .. अल्लाह स्विचर अनुदान मार्गदर्शन हुन सक्छ, ज्ञान एनडी शक्ति 2 काम गर्ने कामहरू उसलाई खुशी पार्दछ .. सरज
मलाई लाग्छ कि यसको एक वालिमा आउटडोर हुनु एक शानदार विचार. एक विशाल पार्क पुरुष र महिलाहरु एक अर्काबाट सकेसम्म सकेसम्म. र एक विशाल BBQ वा गोमांस रोवर छ…. वा त्यो जस्तो अचम्मको कुरा.
म मेरो पति परिवारहरु मा मेरो वाणिज्य घर घरमा थियो. हामीसंग अर्को दिन पुरुष र महिला वालिमिमा वासिमा थिए. भगवानलाई धन्यवाद 100% सलगमेट.
तर कुर्नुहोस्,
तपाईंको श्रीमान् महिला वालिमाको लागि कसरी उपस्थित भएको थियो? यो सबैको तथ्या .्क होइन जुन तपाईं दुई विवाहित हुनुहुन्छ र यसरी त्यहाँ सबैजनाको लागि यो समझदारी हुन्छ?
म चिन्ता गर्छु कि कहिलेकाँही हामी चरम सीमामा विभाजन लिन्छौं. म बुझ्दछु कि यदि त्यहाँ पुरुष र महिलाहरु बीचको मान्छे र महिलाहरु बीच पर्याप्त दूरी को लागी पर्याप्त दूरी दिन छैन. But In general I don’t think that during the prophet’s time there was that much separation. After all didn’t a woman stand up and speak to Umar (RA)? When he was the Caliph and stated that people should not ask for large dowries and the women recited an ayah to him and challenged him on the issue? How separated could they have been if she was able to speak to him? And the technology of curtains was not new to them, they could have done it. I’m not saying this as a fatwa if anything this is a question. It would be nice to have an Imam give a lecture on separation of Men/Women and proper interactions between Men/Women during the time of the Prophet (PBUH).
Assalamu alaikum wrwb
I wish to marry the same way as you have mentioned in the article also I wish to marry a divorcee (we are of the same age) with whose Deen I am convinced with In Shaa Allaah… But the culture comes in between as a big obstruction… I belong to a culture well known for extravagent weddings and also brothers/sisters who are seeking to remarry (especially divorcees) are looked down by the society as if they have great defects. I wish to bring some changes by reviving the Sunnah of our beloved Prophet Sallallahu alaihi wa Sallam by having a simple wedding and also by honoring a divorcee if Allaah wills.
I ve already spoken to my parents about this but they have rejected my plea especially my Mother. I know she loves me a lot. What piece of advise can I have from you so that I will be able convince my Mother for this wedding. I do not want to hurt her but at the same time want her to understand the real wisdom behind bringing a change to the society.
Your earliest reply would be highly appreciated.
Jazakh Allaah Khairan
Your brother in Islam
Jazakallahu khair for this heart touching advice may Allah see us through Ameen
Assalam u Walaikum,
Recently i just started to think about my wedding day, wt it sd be & hw it sd be done? This article is like a blessings from Allah to guide me hw sd I plan my wallimah. In shaa Allah i`ll remember all this info.
Lastly Jazak Allah Khair
This is just the perfect answer have been looking for, i wish pple understood better, धन्यवाद दिनु. Keep the good work goin
Masha’Allah, this is beautiful. <3