Relations Before Marriage: What is the view of the religion concerning [premarital] relations?

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By Pure Matrimony -

Answer: If the questioner means by “before marriage,” before consummation of the marriage but after the contract, then there is no harm in such relations since she is his wife by virtue of the contract, even though they have not decorously consummated the marriage. However, if it is before the marriage, such as during the period of engagement or otherwise, such contact is forbidden and impermissible. It is not allowed for a man to enjoy a non-related women’s company, either by speech, look or private company. It is confirmed the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alaihi-wasallam) said,

”A man cannot be alone with a women except in the presence of [one of her] mahram . And a women cannot travel except with a mahram .” [1]

In sum, if that contact or association is after contract, there is no harm in it. If it is before the marriage ceremony, even if it is after the proposal and acceptance, it is not allowed. Such behaviour is forbidden for him since the women is a non-relative and non-wife until they conclude the marriage contract.

[1] Recorded Muslim.Al-Bukhari has something similar.

Shaykh Muhammad bin Saalih al-`Uthaymeen

Islamic Fatawa Regarding Women – Darussalam Pg. 195-196

10 Comments to Relations Before Marriage: What is the view of the religion concerning [premarital] relations?

  1. MeerZameer

    Aslm,
    Dear Author, I was on a wild-goose chase for this questioner since 5 months.
    Alhumdulillah, I am able to find one. But the article seems to have rich content in its grammar and is bouncing off my head.Can u pls make it simple by replying in simple language.

    I got engaged 3 months back and my marriage is due 5 months.
    I WANT TO CHAT WITH MY FIANCEE.
    My parents didnot permit me saying that they have no clarity of what Islam says on this and even showed their disagreement due to some reasons. I m bound to their decision.

    But i want to know, what exactly Islam says about this. So that I can guide my youngsters with references (and even console myself).
    Pls guide me by replying whether it is permissible or not.
    Any referral links would help me much better as I don’t see any links in this article.
    Awaiting for ur response.

    Allahafiz

    • AOA,

      First you must clear yourself about what you want to chat with you Fiance?
      Of course, It’s clear to everyone.
      A Non-Spiritual Thing chains to evil. So be Kind to your parents. And As it’s given in hadith, if you wanna talk to develop understanding or sharing your point of views on different things, you can do this in presence of mahram.

      You can often visit her house, in presence of her parent you can talk in respectful view and way.

      Good for both of you i think…. 🙂

    • Meet your fiance with her wali. its halal. Mention to them the hadith of the Prophet SAW. Saying its permissible to see one another and chat in halal way.

  2. Dear author,
    i have some parts of your article quite confusing,simple quetion i have is how does the man talk to his fiancee about a topic he would not be comfortable
    talking to her in the presence of another? Furthermore dear author why cant a relationship exist between two people before marriage,isnt the point in dating and courting to help produce a better marriage? thank you.
    Aaron

    • Dating and courting are two seperate things.

      In Islam we are allowed to court, with mahram, wali a male relative usually father. You can meet outside, inside, go to the park walk all together. Ask questions. Even travel together as a family so you can see each other in different scenarios.

      Dating leads to fitnah, temptation, lust and not love, obsession and disobeying ones family and Allah and the Prophet SAW. We are muslim and Love Allah and the prophet More then anyone more then our husbands and wives and family. If something is not permitted as Allah created us he knows us inside and out. then there is hiqma/truth correctness in it. We should not rebel and say we know better? did we creat ourselves? authobillahi.
      Without Islam we are just raging animals… following our lusts and desires. FACT.

  3. Salam alaykun;
    Can two ‘As’ patients proceed wif deir wedding knowin fully well dat deir marriage is likely to produce ‘Ss’ child(ren)?

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