7 Léngkah-léngkah Neangan Istri Muslim

Sumber : thedailyreminders.com
By Zarinah El-Amin Naeem

I’m being stalked. For the past 6 bulan, a brother has been catching me on Facebook and email, EVERYDAY, asking me to help him find a spouse. But I can’t. He wants to know what the problem is and I keep telling him, it’s not ME, it’s not my job to find you a spouse! Maksad abdi, I feel bad but I know that this issue is larger than me and larger than this one brother.

I kept saying, keep in mind, marrying a good Muslim wife that will help you fulfill your goal of Jannah (in the hearafter and in this life) is not the same as picking up a girl in the club or on the street. You are looking for quality, not just a woman. So in light of that, today I’m putting forth Zarinah’s 7 step plan to find a good Muslim wife.

Lengkah 1.
Nyucikeun niat! Punten entong naroskeun ka saha waé pikeun ngabantosan anjeun milarian pasangan upami anjeun henteu leres-leres mikirkeun KENAPA anjeun hoyong. Dina kasus di luhur, lanceuk boga niat alus, anjeunna hoyong gaduh outlet halal pikeun kahayang fisik, anjeunna hoyong janten bapa, anjeunna hoyong dukungan, anjeunna ngan polos Ole hayang hiji kulawarga! Tapi naon anu kuring mendakan sareng anjeunna sareng anu sanésna nyaéta yén sababaraha kali alesan pikeun kawin ngan ukur anu munggaran: kabutuhan fisik. Éta tujuan hirup urang, éta teu cukup pikeun ngadukung hiji nikah jeung awéwé mindeng bisa nyokot "sex wungkul" aroma ti mil jauh. Nyucikeun niat!

Lengkah 2.
Pariksa bédana umur! Lamun hayang boga budak, éta lain hartosna anjeun kudu nikah rumaja atawa batur di awal dua puluhan maranéhanana. Kuring geus ngadéngé, “well I want a family so I only want to marry someone who is young.” Although less frequent, there are women who bear children well into their late 30s and early 40s. We as a community are past the “half your age + 7″ marriageable age range (if you don’t know what I’m talking about see the film Malcolm X ), so please be realistic. Dina pendapat abdi, a realistic age difference is anywhere from 1-10 taun. Any more than that is just plain on unrealistic! To put it plainly, if you are going on 40 and above, don’t expect to marry a 20-something sister. And if you are near retirement and social security, marry someone your age! There are plenty of beautiful, fun loving mature sisters looking for a good husband.

Lengkah 3.
Get active. People have jobs, sakola, and responsibilities, but that does not negate the fact that each one of us has the responsibility to get active in our Muslim community. The best place to find a Muslim spouse is in a Muslim environment – i.e. at the Masjid or Muslim functions. So get active, get involved and get to know people as a person….not someone who just comes around when they are looking to get married.

Lengkah 4.
Check the shyness. Sumuhun, Muslim women are to be put up on a pedestal, but that does not mean we are unattainable. Most Muslim women I know are open to being approached – in a RESPECTFUL manner. So put on your best game. sareng yén anjeun bageur, this may be a shocker – but many women don’t care how much you make! They just want someone who has a good spirit, treats them nicely and is striving to please Allah. You don’t have to be a millionaire to do that. Just have a decent job or student loan (seuri) and come strong! That being said, don’t be afraid to let people know you are looking for a wife.

Lengkah 5.
Check your life outside of the masjid. Don’t have a masjid life and a street life. Strengthen your relationship with Allah. séks sareng ngalahirkeun murangkalih mangrupikeun hak anu paling ageung pikeun lalaki dina nikah, you don’t have to be perfect but don’t have club pictures of you and 4-5 women on your side on your facebook page and then come talking about “I want a sister on her deen.” Get on your deen and then worry about the sister!

Lengkah 6.
Be presentable! Kangjeng Nabi (nempo) was one whose clothes were clean, who smelled good and was well groomed. Most ladies take care of themselves and we want our men to take care of themselves too! We understand if you are a man who works with his hands (i.e. a mechanic, painter, naha anjeunna muslim atanapi henteu). Kami ngartos sareng kami hormat éta. Tapi lamun datang ka masjid ngan saukur kotor tanpa alesan ... éta ngan jahat jeung total turnoff! Salaku tambahan, teu kabeh ngeunaan duit jeung sadulur, tapi urang resep lalaki anu ngahargaan dirina jeung bangga penampilan maranéhanana.

Lengkah 7.
Ngartos yén awéwé Amérika anu kuat. Awéwé béda, urang boga kapribadian béda, béda karesep jeung teu diaku. Tapi aya tema umum di Amérika, loba urang teu nyangka jadi ibu rumah tangga pikeun sakabéh kahirupan urang. Urang indit ka sakola, urang gawe, Kami aktip sareng kami hoyong ngahontal tujuan pribadi. Janten siap-siap ngabagi padamelan sareng padamelan sanés. Siap ngadukung pamajikan anjeun dina karirna. Disiapkeun pikeun boga salaki nu bisa nyieun leuwih duit ti anjeun! Tapi sadayana, siap jadi lalaki (in all senses of the word!) (Side note, some women do indeed want to be a housewife, perhaps while raising the children – these things should be discussed!)

If you follow the above 7 steps, I promise (with Allah’s permission) that you will be married much sooner than later! I’m open to all RESPECTFUL feedback
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Sumber : thedailyreminders.com

Rujukan: Niyah.net