Maybe it has something to do with the way that our brains function. The truth of the matter is, this is a question that has long perplexed many millions of people dying to know the truth about men and women.
Countless studies have been done into the way men and women think and behave. If you ask most men, they will actually tell you that they don’t really know what women want. They don’t even know how to handle a woman, let alone understand her!
And the complaint for men from women is exactly the same. Allah SWT naturally created men and women to think and act differently. In other words we are hardwired to behave differently. And it has its uses.
For example, women are soft and nurturing and are far more likely to be emotional. This is very useful when you are raising children. You need to have that soft emotional side to deal with babies and young children.
On the other hand, men are usually stronger – both in an emotional and physical sense. And because Allah SWT has made men the protectors and maintainers of women, naturally you would expect them not to be as emotional as women are. Can you imagine a man trying to protect a woman and at the same time getting all emotional and crying if they got hurt?!!
Men need to be strong in order to take care of their families. You know what they say – it’s a dog eat dog world out there. When women typically run into difficulties, their immediate reaction is to get upset, emotional and even cry.
If men were to run into the same difficulties, their reaction would be completely different. The might get irritated or annoyed, but their instinctive reaction would be to look for a solution to the problem. Of course this is far more useful than getting upset!
So maybe there is something in this after all. I remember my husband being a typical alpha male – he wanted to be the one that protected me and could take care of me. All I ever wanted was a hug. I never really got it. Funny thing is, my friends complained of the same thing too.
It was always the same complaint – their men were completely devoid of any emotion. Now years later, I realised that this isn’t true. Men do have feelings, they just choose not to show them. I used to think that this was their weakness, but it’s taken me a very long time to learn that in actual fact it’s not. My only real gripe was that I wanted my husband to notice me. I wanted him to be romantic and pay me compliments. I used to wish that he would hug me just for the sake of it. But it never happened.
Now I know finally, after more than a decade of being with him – how to finally handle him. The only problem is we’ve split up now, so it’s too late. However, over the last two years in particular, I’ve heard many sisters and indeed many brothers complaining that they really don’t understand their spouse.
And unfortunately, with divorce rates rising, these key differences between men and women need to be understood more now than ever before. Just knowing how to deal with your spouse and understanding the natural differences that Allah SWT has created in them, can really go a long way to helping solve the problem of the constant conflict we have with our differences.
Written By The Girl In The Black Hijaab
….Where Practice Makes Perfect
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