Падзяліцеся гэтым
Крыніца : peacepropagation.com
Надхра Салман.
Пасля зносін з многімі жанчынамі, Я выявіў нешта сапраўды дзіўнае. Жанчыны вельмі розныя па сваёй прыродзе, у адрозненне ад мужчын. Гэта таму, што большасць мужчын маюць аднолькавыя звычкі і грубыя ў большасці аспектаў. Наадварот, жанчыны лічацца ветлівымі, мяккі і салодкі,што насамрэч няпраўда!!.Нешматлікія жанчыны цвёрдыя, як скура, а іншыя салодкія, як мёд,некаторыя вельмі любяць і клапатлівыя, а многія надзвычай халодныя,горды і няўважлівы.
Так што ў залежнасці ад яе прыроды, жанчына можа альбо зрабіць свой дом Джанна (Рай) ці яшчэ горш за пекла....
У старасці,жанчыны часта схільныя губляць цярпенне і лаяць дзяцей,іх дочкі або іх нявесткі. Большасць дзяўчат лічаць, што іх свякроў жорсткія, а некаторыя нават называюць іх Дракула, але калі мы ўважліва паназіраем, то даведаемся, што ў іх любячае сэрца. Толькі ўзрост і некалькі іншых фактараў прымушаюць іх гучаць строга і жорстка. Мы ніколі не павінны судзіць пра кнігу па яе вокладцы. Калі свякроў гучыць вельмі жорстка ці заўсёды саркастычна, нават тады дзяўчына павінна заўсёды паважаць яе, клапаціцца пра яе і марнаваць сваю энергію на тое, каб зрабіць яе шчаслівай(таму што гэта складаная задача).Самае галоўнае, каб яна лічыла яе сваёй маці і паводзіла сябе адпаведна.
Алах кажа «Твой Гасподзь пастанавіў, каб вы не пакланяліся нікому, акрамя Яго, і каб вы былі добрымі (Іхсан) да бацькоў. Незалежна ад таго, ці дасягне старасці ў тваім жыцці адзін або абодва, не кажы ім ні слова пагарды, ні адбіваць іх, але звяртайцеся да іх з пункту гледжання гонару. І, з дабрыні, апусьці ім крыло пакоры, і сказаць: Гасподзь мой! Адары іх сваёй міласэрнасцю, як яны песцілі мяне ў дзяцінстве». [Аль-Каран 17:23]
«Ваш уладар пастанавіў, каб вы пакланяліся толькі яму і праяўлялі дабрыню да бацькоў. Калі адзін або абодва дажывуць старасць разам з табой, не кажы цьфу! Ім і не адбіць, але гавары з імі ласкава»[Аль-Каран 17:23]
Самае галоўнае - яна заўсёды павінна маўчаць і ніколі не папракаць. Дзяўчына, якая хоча зрабіць свой дом сапраўды спакойным месцам, павінна крыху ахвяраваць, зрабіўшы маўчанне палітыкай перад сваёй свякрухай. Такім чынам яна таксама дагаджае Алаху і атрымае велізарную ўзнагароду за сваё цярпенне.
Алах кажа: «Толькі цярплівыя атрымаюць узнагароду ў поўнай меры,без разлікаў» [Аль-Каран 39:10]
«І сапраўды,хто праяўляе цярпенне і даруе,гэта было б сапраўды з рэчаў, рэкамендаваных Алахам " [Аль-Каран 42:43]
Было таксама заўважана, што шмат дзяўчат, якія ветлівыя, і добра паводзяць сябе са свякрухай, іх часта вельмі любяць мужы. З іншага боку, калі ў любым доме заўсёды адбываюцца бойкі, мужчына турбуецца, і гэта ўплывае на яго, таму ён шукае рашэнне гэтай праблемы і можа ў канчатковым выніку развесціся з ёй.
Часам бывае таксама, што мужчыны становяцца слугамі сваіх жонак і пакідаюць сваіх маці. Гэта вельмі неэтычна,амаральна і моцна не падабаецца Алаху. Такім чынам, мужчыны павінны захоўваць баланс паміж імі і заўсёды мець на ўвазе, што толькі з-за іх маці яны дасягнулі такога росту, таму новая жанчына ў сям'і не павінна прымусіць яго забыць пра стары; Таму што «СТАРОЕ ЗАЎСЁДЫ ЗОЛОТА». Больш за тое, не дагаджаючы Алаху, ніхто не можа дагадзіць іншым.
Алах кажа ў Каране: «О чалавецтва! Шануйся свайго Госпада і Захавальніка, Той, хто стварыў вас усіх з адной душы, і стварыў з яго сваю пару, і ад іх двух нарадзілася шмат мужчын і жанчын. Шануйцеся Алаха і ўлонняў (што табе надакучыла). Вядома, Алах назірае за вамі ". [Аль-Каран 4:1]
Расказвае Айша Умм аль-Мумінін: «Я спытаў Прарока (сас): Хто мае большае права на жанчыну? Ён (сас) сказаў:муж . я сказаў: І хто мае большае права на чалавека? Ён (сас) сказаў:яго маці».(Аль-Хакім - узяты з фікха ас-Сунна)
У іншым Хадысе пра гэта паведамляе Абу Хурайра:
— спытаў я, «Пасланец Алаха, каму я павінен быць абавязаны?” Ён адказаў, «Твая маці». — спытаў я, «Тады каго?” Ён адказаў, «Твая маці». — спытаў я, «Тады каго?” Ён адказаў, «Твая маці». — спытаў я, «Тады каго?” Ён адказаў, «Твая маці». — спытаў я, «Тады каму я павінен быць абавязаны?” Ён адказаў, «Твой бацька,а затым наступны бліжэйшы сваяк, а потым наступны.»…..(Сахіх Муслім)
На жаль, там, дзе матэрыялізм і лібералізм паўплывалі на немусульман, гэта не пакінула мусульман незакранутымі,асабліва нашых жанчын,якія страцілі здольнасць думаць у сваіх спробах атрымаць часовыя задавальнення гэтага свету. Яны любяць пераймаць кафарам (Немусульмане) і парушаць законы, устаноўленыя Алахам. Многія нядбайна ставяцца да сваіх абавязкаў у адносінах да ісламу.
A Muslim woman who wishes to gain Allah’s acceptance, should always make efforts to please Allah. She should always keep in her mind the Jannah and rewards that Allah has promised for believing women.
She should avoid rivalry and disputes with her mother in law by staying tolerant and ignore her short comings. This can happen if she starts loving her for the sake of Allah.And Allah loves those who love others for His sake. Thinking about worldly comforts and interests might jeopardize her position among Allah’s blessed slaves. She should remain wise and totally reject the idea of bartering this transitory life for the eternal one.
Allah says in Quarn: «Сапраўды! As for those who believe and do righteous deeds, вядома! We shall not suffer to be lost the reward of anyone who does his (righteous) deeds in the most perfect manner”. [Аль-Каран 18:30]
This doesn’t mean that i am supporting those mother in laws who harass or physically or mentally torture their daughter in laws. Allah Almighty is very merciful and just. If a woman’s survival becomes difficult due to extreme cruelty of her mother in law and she believes that she can’t bear or compromise, then Islam has given her a right to ask for khula. If any couple fails to live in harmony then they can separate.
Алах кажа: “If the efforts for settlement are unsuccessful then you may separate in accordance with the instructions given by Allah Almighty . Do not let the fear of being left without provision become a hurdle in separation. The Divine System will provide for you in abundance. Allah Almighty is Bountiful and Wise. [Аль-Каран 4:130]
Another important thing that contributes to a happy life, which most women ignore is to remain silent in front of their husbands. There are some who keep on complaining about their circumstances as a consequence many men out of desperation seek unlawful haraam (forbiddened) sources of income and in this way prepare themselves and their husbands to be the fuel of hell fire. In this case too,its all about being patient and silent. Much could be overcome if only women possess these qualities.
It has been narrated on the authority of Ibn ‘Umar that the Holy Prophet (May be upon him) said A man is a guardian over the members of his family and shall be questioned about them (as to how he looked after their physical and moral well-being). A woman is a guardian over the household of her husband and his children and shall be questioned about them (as to how she managed the household and brought up the children). A slave is a guardian over the property of his master and shall be questioned about it (as to how he safeguarded his trust). Сцеражыся, every one of you is a guardian and every one of you shall be questioned with regard to his trust. (Сахіх Муслім)
Our history is full of women of character,the women of Jannah. The Ummahaat and their dedication towards Islam,their patience and their dislike for the worldly goods.
Hazrat Asmaa Bint Abu Bakr a noble woman,daughter of a rich man, at the time when she got married to Hazrat Zubair,у яго быў толькі конь і быў вельмі бедны. Яна цярпліва пераносіла ўсе цяжкасці і была ўдзячная Алаху.
Яна паведаміла: «аз-Зубайр (Ібн аль-Аввам, стрыечны брат прарока Мухамеда, праз сваю цётку) выйшла за мяне замуж. У яго не было ні багацця, раб або што-небудзь яшчэ падобнае, акрамя вярблюда (атрымаць ваду) і конь. Я пасвіў яго каня, [даваць яму корм і даглядаць, і молатыя фінікі для яго вярблюда. Акрамя гэтага, Я пасвіў вярблюда], прыняты меры па забеспячэнні [гэта з] вады і залатаны [яго] скураное вядро і замешвала муку. Але я не ўмеў пячы хлеб, так мае суседкі пяклі мне хлеб [і гэта былі шчырыя жанчыны]. А я насіў на галаве камяні (насенне) датаў з зямлі аз-Зубайра, якімі надзяліў яго Пасланец Алаха, і гэта было на адлегласці дзвюх міляў (з Медзіны).
Каб яе дом быў напоўнены любоўю,мір і дабраславеньне Алаха жанчына павінна пайсці на кампраміс і зрабіць усё, што ад яе залежыць, каб прадухіліць разбурэнне яе шлюбнага жыцця.
Таму ў многіх выпадках маўчанне - лепшая палітыка- жанчыны павінны прывіваць гэта
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Крыніца : peacepropagation.com
[Пра аўтара: Аўтарам гэтага артыкула з'яўляецца сястра Надра Салман, якая з'яўляецца набожнай і практыкуючай мусульманкай. Яна актыўна піша пра іслам і перадае пасланне ісламу праз свае творы.]
Я бачу, адкуль гэты артыкул, але згаданыя вышэй хадысы адносяцца непасрэдна да бацькоў, а твае тлумачэнні адносяцца да цешчы. I know a husband would like his wife to treat his mother the same way she treats her own. However a mother in law also has an obligation to reciprocate that respect and love. A mother in law can never be a mother and although one should respect their in laws, Islam does not demand a daughter in law to look after her in laws if she does not wish to. One should always look after their own parents, and Islamically that is the duty bestowed upon us. There is no point looking after your mother in law when you neglect the primary duty of looking after your own parents. This happens in alot of cultures, and although I agree with the fact that elders should always be respected no matter how rude or spiteful they may be. Я не магу не адзначыць той факт, што гэты артыкул мае некаторыя культурныя ўхілы, дзе чакаецца, што жанчына пакутуе ў цішыні, паслухмяна выконвайце яе законы і не прасіце правоў, якія Алах даў ёй, а культура і чалавецтва адабралі.
Я згодны з Зарай на многіх узроўнях. Я сапраўды лічу, што часам жонка павінна маўчаць, але я зноў і зноў бачыў, што жанчына вытрымлівае так шмат, каб выратаваць свой шлюб. Толькі пакуль вы можаце рабіць гэта самастойна, гэта павінна быць а 2 спосаб рэчы. Што датычыцца заканадаўчага забеспячэння, я лічу, што лепшым рашэннем для задавальнення іх патрэб з'яўляецца пражыванне асобна, гэта стварае самыя здаровыя адносіны паміж усімі. Я адчуваю, што захаванне законаў з'яўляецца прычынай праблем паміж мужам і жонкай, wife and in laws. But the article did have some very good points.
i agree girls with u 2 esp zahra x
Yes u are right, я згодны з табой
why a women in this article is assumed to take khula just because of mother in law? will she not b punished of creating misunderstanding n seperation b/w wife n husband although it is mentioned in hadith that shaitan becomes most happy with that shaitan who made the couple to fight n in seperation n divorce vl it not b considered? if all the efforts to make mother in law happy doesn’t work then what should a girl do in such a situation?
Ананім
Good question Asma. My MIL almost caused a divorce when my daughter was only 2 гадоў. 10 years later I am still married, Alhamdulillah but I still have to deal with her manipulating ways. І чаму жанчыны павінны маўчаць? Ці не таму гэтыя MIL проста працягваюць рабіць тое, што яны робяць?
Цалкам згодны з Зарай. Хадысы, на якія спасылаецца, гавораць пра бацькоў, а не пра свякроў. І хаця я таксама згодны з тым, што сваякоў трэба паважаць, яны не такія ж, як нашы ўласныя бацькі. Таксама, у той час як я лічу, што жанчыны павінны зрабіць усё магчымае, каб захаваць мір у сям'і, Я не разумею, як гэта абавязкова прыраўноўваецца да быцця “маўклівы.” Калі вы ведаеце, што нешта сказанае або зробленае няправільна, згадаць пра гэта павінна быць вашым абавязкам, хоць і з павагай. Таму я лічу разумным сачыць за сваім языком і думаць, перш чым гаварыць, і прапанаваць некаторыя рэкамендацыі, якія прыходзяць на розум, а не ўвогуле не гаварыць. Хто ведае, it might stop trouble in its track or cause someone to think twice before doing something haraam.
I didn’t finish reading the article but it seems to be going on in the vein that the onus for building a harmonious home and marriage lies completely with the woman and woman only. Not precise nor is it accurate when one considers the fact that man is at least 50% of that relationship and also the fact that women are by nature relational, therefore have relationship needs, therefore will express them…hence defying the explicit instruction within the article to the woman to ‘remain silent’. Disappointingly typical rhetoric.
yeah its somewhat bias but i also hav something to know regarding how to treat a mother in law when it comes to a husband. like a husband manipulate things to destry the mother daughter relationship and fought with the mother in law most so often and even tell many times or more than 3 times that he is divorcing his wife to his in law. but the wife tried to pacify the husband not to divorce for the sake of kids till the respect to his wife was gone and the husband became like the wife who nags the wholenight while the wife kept her silence coz she cannot giv herself to her husband due to depression for her husbands attitude who took advantage of her weakness and who always tells lie regarding the wife and her family. and the wife demands a divorce coz she no longer can take her husbands lies, manipulation and even blackmail her for the kids. and in addition to that, жонка павінна дапамагчы ў задавальненні патрэб сям'і і адукацыі дзяцей. так, мае пытанні, ці можа жонка патрабаваць разводу, і ці іх шлюб усё яшчэ сапраўдны з-за таго, што ён шматразова выказвае развод з жонкай, бо я ведаю, што 3 раз муж сказаў, што талака дзейнічае ў ісламе. што можа зрабіць жонка, калі муж цяпер адмаўляецца ад разводу, але жонка настойвае на гэтым, таму што яна адчувае, што больш не можа жыць пад адным дахам са сваім мужам з-за яго горшага стаўлення і страху ў будучыні, што муж можа зрабіць некаторыя фізічныя дзеянні сваёй жонцы, і гэта тое, што жонка хоча прадухіліць, будучы эфект для міру ў сям'і…what if the husband hardly refused the divorce but the wife too intense also to have a divorce coz she think she will die in his hands and she is also no longer capable of serving him as a wife…thank u for this long complicated situation…
That silence is golden depends on the situation. Women tend to have differences over major and minor issues. Women are, пасля Усяго, more emotional creatures. Keeping silent over petty squabbles is best and the woman is better off thinking, what would I do if my mother was standing before me. Сапраўды гэтак жа, the mother-in-law should be thinking, would I be saying these things to my own daughter.
I agree with the other comments regarding the cultural bias. A women should speak up when there is right and wrong involved, and respectfully. A muslimah is a thinking woman. She should not have to keep silent if what is going on around her is wrong, Islamically, morally and ethically.
It is sad that a Muslim woman advises women to shut up and be silent. This article is the exact antithesis of advancement of women rights. But the real sad thing is; it is done in the name of Islam. My heart sinks when this kind of speach comes from a woman.
The article is great jazakallah but seems sisters are seeing it biased. If so then write on brothers as well.
Truth is silence can be golden in some issues but not in an unjust situation. Our oppressers can not be ignored we talk it out and try educate them.
Salam alaykum…
Summary of the article:”women must support every thing, suffer in silence, take care of everything, and never disturbe their husbands by their problems with their mothers in laws, and this is the good woman”
this article scared me!! who read it feel like marriage is a panishement, a war..!!.. woman is a humanbeen like man she can get angry, she can do a reflex against unjastise.. this is normal.. but in this article she has to suffer in silence and she w’ll be rewarded by JANNAH..!! I know women who became psychopath because of this policy (supporting every thing and never say a word).. woman is sensible and she can’t be perfect! and her husband must be fair b/w his mother and his wife.. mother is mother and wife is wife.. and man is a part of this; he can’t stay away and watch..! stress and pression make the woman unable to do anything, she can’t do her role as a mother and as a wife.. contrary she w’ll be a nervous woman and all this has repercussions on her married life..
(remarque: abuse and maltreatment; physical or psychological; can condition ‘sterility’ for woman.. because of hormonal imbalance.)
This article is misleading and an insult.!! This why so much abuse of females goes on in Muslim ‘World’. If your Mo. In Law is mean/rude/trying to run-control YOUR home, wife be quiet. if your spouse abuses/negelcts you/keeps you from schooling and obtaining a Skill, keep quiet. If a girl is married off to some man she doesn’t know or want, жаночага полу, “Be Quiet”.. Your Guardian or parent owes a Opium or ___,? debt and the girls are sold-off, mom/females, “be quiet” !! I Thank ALLAH swt, I am living in America, in spite of it’s problems and Islamophobia. Get a Doll or a dog , if a man wants “SIlence”. Women have no voice in the Masjids affairs and Finances (in America, where OLD School, immigrant chauvinists men, still control masjids. And females and Youth have NO voice, or overseas!!). Husband doesn’t want to work, but uses the wife’s welfare benefits, yet complains about ,”The Koofar….”, here in America, but wife , “be quiet”. A husband takes on another wife, he CANNOT afford, жонка “be quiet”. A husband abuses sexually/physically step-children or his children,…. , маці , ‘be quiet”. Husband owns or works at a Liquor store, жонка , “be quiet!!
Па-першае, the article is good. Па-другое, the article only mentioned about how a women who is already married should interact with their mother in-law. There is no wrong in that, it’s just not fully elaborate enough in doing so (silence is not the only way, it is just the best method like it mentioned). Most of you might already know about it, but let me remind you (жанчыны) again why woman got the special advantage in Islam to be easily accepted into Heavens and what it is. It’s easy; absolute obedience to ALLAH and Prophet Muhammad (іслам), and obey your husband command (as long as he didnt order the ‘haraam’; which is forbidden in Islam). Do those and you will be granted the Heaven that are promised to those who seek for ALLAH forgiveness. For men, that’s not the case. They have a greater task to be done in life to gain that (ALLAH blessing & His Heaven). Bias? не, it is a role bestowed upon us human. Equality? Dont let me start on it. Easily said, do we like to be a robot who all look the same and who all do have the same task doing the same thing again and again for all eternity? It’s called variation; varities, differents which make life more colourful and more entertaining. Ну, if you ever wonder, why cant a woman do what a man do? The answer is, yes you can. But on a base that a woman is not married. But then she must obey her parents. As you can see, it is the same thing but with a different situation. But the task is even greater, the same as a man task! Дык вось, how many of you that truly obey your parents? I’ll leave that question for you yourself to answer it, because only you know thy self..
For those who didnt know, a wife should not obey or devote herself for her in-law parents for she is no more obliged to obey their own parents! Please notice the priority and speciality bestowed upon a person who is entitled WIFE!
*Re-read the narration from Aisya Umm Al-Mu’minin
silence is a good policy but not always best.and practical implementation of this policy always leaves a muslimah on areceiving end in this world not to speak of innumerable benefits in the hereafter.moreover in this process of being mute children tend to suffer tremendously whose personality is adversely affected in the long run.there should be a more practical and islamic approach.Allah knows best.
didn’t find this article good.. u said if a women can’t tolerate her mother inlaws behaviour nd all that then she had an option for khulaa how ever islam has given right to a women to have her own home seperately… nd if a women treats good to his husbands mother or father do khidmat to them then its her kindness not her duty!!
Ассаламу алейкум,
Whilst I can appreciate the other sisters response to this article, I don’t think it is how the writer intended it. And whilst the hadith do refer to ones own parents, personally for me I’d like to apply those to my parent in laws too, after all I’d like to be treated like a daughter so should I not treat them as my parents.
This article reminded me of the story of Ibrahim, калі ён наведаў свайго сына і знайшоў там толькі яго нявестку. На пытанне, як ідуць справы, яна толькі скардзілася. Пакінуў сыну пасланне, каб той замяніў парог у браме – маючы на ўвазе развод з жонкай. Тут можна атрымаць важны ўрок, сябар Алаха, Прарок, які перавысіў свае задачы і той, хто з'яўляецца выдатным прыкладам tawukkul ў Алаха, параіў свайму сыну развесціся з жонкай, таму што яна скардзілася (хоць і незнаёмаму чалавеку) занадта шмат.
Так, у гэтым артыкуле ёсць некаторыя культурныя ўхілы, але, як заўсёды, вазьміце добрае і пакіньце дрэннае. Я лічу справядлівым сказаць, што звычайна сёстры выходзяць замуж са жудаснымі гісторыямі свякроў і наадварот, і я ўпэўнены, што гэта ў пэўнай ступені ўплывае на адносіны. But its also fair to say that its probably a scary realisation for the husband to consider that his wife and mother will not get along.
I would much rather have positive thoughts and not go into marriage preparing for a battle with the mother in law. And not to forget that if Allah is pleased with you then he will cause the people to be pleased with you – you don’t have to suffer in slience to please Allah. But Allah rewards the patient and the article mentions some beautiful examples of hardships faced by the beautiful mothers of our Ummah.
Ma’salama
I feel that some important points have been covered in the article. This is perhaps a key reason why some of the marital problems within the Muslim community exist. 2 points: I agree to some extent with some of the responses here that mother in-laws should reciprocate. Аднак, point 2, some of the comments on this thread are examples of women in contemporary not being able to swallow the truth. The reality is men and women are equal, так, however they have different duties in life, which is why they have different roles to play. I.e. men join the army. Аднак, problems in today’s society are a result of both men and women failing to properly understand their role within society.
Assalmuilkum! I read the article & I see it as very un-inslamic in my opinion! Allah clearly gave us women rights, he brought down the laws of “preventing the death of daughters” marriage rights etc. I refuse to believe Im apart of a faith that lowers the standards of its women & suggest that they should not only be silent but put up with the bad manners of parents in laws or otherwise. Parents- Mothers especially need to realise that respect goes both ways. Allah doesnt favour anyone but his devoted slaves who follow the Quran. I think that the verses for being good to parents means the GOOD ones, like Ibrahim (ПБУХ) not the ones who use their given status to force evil fate in their childrens lives. All this talk of never even questioning your parents for any reasons is like worshipping them to me & I reserve that privilege for Allah only. My parents are both Muslim, Alhumdulillah and guess what?! They use “respect your parents or you wont see paradise” to blackmail us like most muslim parents do. Mother in laws need to get a grip! Their supposed to be raising men not boys who are still being breast fed after marriage. Its a sin to interfer in a marriage- thats an agreement between Allah (SWT), чалавек & жонка. If mothers want to be the shaitan in the middle & sow discourse then they deserve pity & distance & not respect. We are muslims not doormats! We can behave how we need to when we have no choice. Be good to those who are good & leave the ones who have forgotten their duty as a believer are willing to destroy a man from his beautiful rib (жонка) & Алах ведае лепш! Please stop brain washing sisters into staying quiet, the female Ummah are suffering enough! Muslim sisters empower yourselves, the prophet Adam & Eve (PBUT) have rights to us all, after all they are the true parents of this dunya! Мір & Love 🙂
Agreed Amina, agreed 🙂
I agree that daughter in-laws should try and keep the peace, but often we hear that the mother in-laws are petty, more than the daughter in-laws. And mother in-laws are not the same as mothers. Mothers love us unconditionally, but we do find cases where the mother in-laws don’t approve of the daughter in-laws, and therefore find a problem with everything they do. SO, even though the mother in-law deserves respect, she does not have the same status as a MOTHER, the MOTHER raised the child, not the mother in-law. А што тычыцца “suffering in silence”? I believe that even Aisha (Р.А) argued with the Prophet (ПБУХ) at times, yet she was his favourite wife…so silence? Not exactly the best policy. Да таго ж, if the women is expected to remain silent to keep the peace, then so should the husband. This article was probably written with good intentions, but unfortunately it makes it seem like it’s the woman that’s always the problem.
I just wanted to say it was Hadrat khadija who was Prophet Mohammad saw’s favourite who he used to praise infront of Hadrat Aisha ra even. Hadrat Khadija was known as the most humble and non jealous woman, also Prophet saw did not marry another till she passed away. Hadrat Aisha was the youngest hence the most cared for. but again in todays world we cant compare ourselves with any of the prophets wives from the past.
Don’t agree with the article at all. It’s probably written for people who live within a sub-continental culture, not Islamic culture. If the husbands mother (the word ‘mother-in-law is misleading cause it gives the impression of some other woman being your mother or even close to it) is difficult and is imposing in your marriage, move away and live your married life. She is not the problem of the daughter in law. She is the problem of the son. If she is difficult, the son has to deal with it. If she is demanding, the son has to deal with it. Nothing to do with the daughter in law. This is a completely un – Islamic solution. Silence is not a solution. Educating the ignorant jahilliyah masses about their religion is the key.
Assalamu caleykum to all my sisters and brothers,
I think it is a shame for us to attack our sister who took the time to write this piece of advise. Just like many of you guys I do not agree with alot of what she said but that does not mean we have the right to attack her. Just like each and everyone of us she is also entitled to her own opinion. If you don’t agree with her that is fine but we should repect her opinion. Even though it is sister Nadhra’s opinion to remain silent it is not an obligation in Islam so I don’t understand why many of you are anger. I would like to thank sister Nadhra for taking the time to write this article and telling us her views.
Thank you for the article. Really appreciate your efforts.
Але. This article is misleading.
I agree with little in this article. It calls on women to take the emotional burden for adults who should be behaving more, like adults. Women should not take abuse and sacrifice their peace of heart and mind so she can maintain a fake ‘happy marriage’. Men and mothers-in-law also have responsibilties, which includes the emotional wellbeing of a dauther-in-law / жонка.
Women are strong and the role model for each child.
I would encourage women to have courage and tackle situations constructively, as everyone deserves a peaceful life so they can be the best person they can and worship the Lord, and not always be in distress and unhappy, bcuz someone else dumped their unhappiness on her.
A women should never stay silent when she is experiencing mental torture and abuse, what about her happiness, what about her iman? Why should she suffer? And for how long must she wait and why should she wait when she has options to choose seek peace.
Abuse can harm someone to the core, we become numb to the pain, we start to believe its ok and we start to believe its the norm when its not. This is not helpful, it doesn’t help the women who is suffering to find a solution, how could she be told to stay silent!