Sandwich mahalo

“Respect him verbally, intellectually, and physically,”

Verbally speaking, she wants us to cut back on the complaining and add in compliments.

“If you want to have a peaceful, happy marriage, learn the art of the compliment. Compliments are like magnets and the more you compliment your husband the more he will be attracted to you. Begin to notice when he does it right and verbally encourage him by complimenting him at least once a day. If you are having a hard time thinking of anything to admire, consider these categories: physical traits, mental skills, financial strengths, spiritual growth, or healthy relationships with others (keiki, parents, or friends).

You may be asking “Hey, why should I compliment him when he NEVER compliments me?” Because, if you want your marriage to grow and bloom, you’ll have to water it with kindness and encouragement.

A laila, as he sees your sincere efforts, he will begin to change too. Don’t give up.

If you do need to bring up a difficult issue, place it between two compliments, also known as a ‘Compliment Sandwich.’ Here’s an example, ‘Honey, I know how hard you work for our money and that Sally’s braces will be expensive, but I need your decision before her appointment tomorrow. I hope we can do this for her, but if you want to wait, I trust your judgment. What should I tell the orthodontist?'” Anderson.

A compliment sandwich. Doesn’t sound too hard. See if restructuring your sentences when you are bringing up a difficult issue can bring out a different kind of response (..or man) from your spouse.