지혜의 진주: 신부를 위한 조언

압둘말리크 (라디얄라후 '그렇습니다') 말했다, “'Awf ibn Muhalim al-Shaybani'가 있을 때, Jaahiliyyah 기간 동안 아랍 귀족의 가장 존경받는 지도자 중 한 명 (무지의 시간) 그의 딸과 결혼하고 있었다, Umm Iyas to al-Harith ibn ‘Amr al-Kindi and as she was made ready to be taken to the groom, her mother, Umaamah came into her room to advise her and said,

'”O my daughter, if it were deemed unnecessary to give you this advice because of good manners and noble descent, then it would have been unnecessary for you, because you possess these qualities. But it (the following advice) will serve as a reminder to those who are forgetful, and will help those who are wise.

O my daughter, if a woman were able to do wthout a husband by virtue of her father’s wealth and her need for her father, then you of all people would be most able to do without a husband, but women were created for men just as men were created for them.

O my daughter, you are about to leave the home in which you grew up, where you first learned to walk, to go to a place you do not know, to a companion to whom you are unfamiliar. By marrying you, he has become a master over you, so be like a servant to him, and he will become like a servant to you. Take from me ten qualities, which will be a provision and a reminder for you:

* The first and second of them are: Be content in his company, and listen to and obey him, for contentment brings peace of mind, and listening to and obeying one’s husband pleases Allah (the Glorious and Mighty).

* The third and fourth of them are: Make sure that you smell good and look good; he should not see anything ugly in you, and he should not smell anything but a pleasant smell from you. Kohl is the best kind of beautification to be found, and water is better than the rarest perfume.

* The ninth and tenth of them are: Never disclose any of his secrets, and never disobey any of his orders, for if you disclose any of his secrets you will never feel safe from his possible betrayal and his mistrust of you in turn, and if you disobey him, his heart will be filled with hatred towards you.

* Be careful, O my daughter, of showing joy in front of him when he is upset, and do not show sorrow in front of him when he is happy, because the former shows a lack of judgment whilst the latter will make him unhappy.

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