Gawani Izi
Gwero : habibihalaqas.org
Ndi Miriam Islam
WL
Allah swt, mu nzeru zake zopanda malire ndi chifundo chake, adalenga zomangira zaukwati monga zololedwa, njira yosangalatsa yogwirizanitsa anthu aŵiri osawadziŵa kukhala ndi moyo wina ndi mnzake mwachikondi ndi mwamtendere. Mwachidziwitso izi zilipo, koma chomvetsa chisoni n’chakuti sichisamalidwa nthawi zonse ndipo maukwati ambiri achisilamu akutha.
Aliyense amafuna ufulu wake koma amalephera kuganiza za mbali ina ndikunyalanyaza kukwaniritsa ufulu wa ena. Zinthu zikakhala zakuda kwambiri ndipo azungu amayiwala chiyambi cha Chisilamu; chilungamo, chikhululuko ndi kudzichepetsa. Makhalidwe amenewa amasokonekera mkangano ndipo pamakhala nkhondo yozizira pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi wake.
Kusunga mogwirizana ndi maufulu, ufulu waukulu wa mkazi ndi kuchitiridwa chifundo, koma kumbali ina ufulu waukulu umene mwamuna ali nawo pa mkazi ndi Ulemu. Mkwiyo ndi kusonyeza khalidwe laukali ndi njira yosalemekeza munthu. Momwemonso kuputa ndi kukwiyitsa mwamuna kuli ngati kusalemekeza. Kusweka kwaukwati kaŵirikaŵiri kumakhala chotulukapo cha mkwiyo ndi kuchita mwamkwiyo mopupuluma.
Kuti mkazi azilemekeza mwamuna wake ayenera choyamba kumvetsa ndi kupewa zinthu zimene zimam’kwiyitsa. Mkwiyo umadziwonetsera m'njira zosiyanasiyana koma umakonda kukhala ndi chifukwa chozama. Mkazi ayenera kuyesetsa kudziŵa chimene chimayambitsa mkwiyowo asanapeze yankho lililonse. M’munsimu muli zifukwa zingapo zimene zingakwiyitse mwamuna, kuyambira pazifukwa zazing'ono mpaka zazikulu:
• Njala – Njala imatha kupangitsa munthu kukhala wokwiya kwambiri komanso wosakwiya msanga. Mwamuna amayembekezera kuti chakudya chikhale chokonzeka akabwera kuchokera kuntchito. Izi zingawoneke ngati zopanda pake, koma ngati izi zichitika pafupipafupi ndiye kuti chikhoza kukhala chisonyezero cha kusakondwa kwake ndi kasamalidwe ka nthawi / luso la bungwe la mkazi wake komanso kusaganizira..
• Kunyalanyaza Ana ndi ntchito zapakhomo – Mkazi angakhale ndi malonjezo kwina, mwachitsanzo. Ntchito, ntchito zamanja, zokonda zaumwini. Chotsatira chake ana kapena kuyang'anira banja amanyalanyaza. Zimenezi zikusonyeza kuti mwamuna wanu sangasangalale ndi zimene mumaika patsogolo ndipo angafune kuti muunikenso zimene munalonjeza.
• Mavuto a ntchito/ndalama – Zachuma nthawi zambiri zimatha kuyambitsa mavuto ambiri m'mabanja, ndipo chitsenderezo chakukhala wopezera banja chikhoza kubweretsa mavuto. Komabe, ngati mkazi sazindikira zomwe mwamuna wake ali nazo ndipo amawononga nthawi zonse, ndiye kuti sakuvomereza kuyesayesa kwake ndipo akugwiritsa ntchito molakwika kuwolowa manja kwake.. Mwinanso mwamuna angakhale ndi mavuto kuntchito amene sangakambirane ndi mkazi wake, kupangitsa kudzimva kukhala wosakwanira komanso kuopa kuchotsedwa ntchito.
• Vuto la m’banja – Akhoza kukhala ndi mavuto ndi banja lake lomwe sangakuuzeni, koma zomwe zimamukhudza kwambiri. Kukhala mumdima kumangokupangitsani kufunsa ndi kusamvetsetsa ndipo zingakwiyitse iye chifukwa chosakhala ndi chidwi.
• Kuzunza munthu amene amamukonda – Mwina simunasonyeze khalidwe labwino kapena kukhumudwitsa munthu amene amamukonda ndi kumulemekeza, monga achibale ake kapena mabwenzi apamtima. Mawu/zochita zanu mwina zidakhala mwadala kapena ayi, koma wina adakhumudwa nazo ndikudziwitsa mwamuna wako, potero kumupweteka ndi kumukwiyitsa.
• Kumupweteka ndi mawu/zochita zam'mbuyomu – Mwina munalankhulapo kapena kuchita chinachake chimene chinamupweteka kwambiri kalekale, koma zomwe sanatchule panthawiyo. Chifukwa chake adalola kuti nkhaniyi ikule ndikukukwiyirani mwachisawawa panthawi ina.
• Kumupangitsa kudziona ngati wosafunika – Mutha kukhala wodzidalira kwambiri, munthu wopambana, amene ali bwino pa multitasking. Ngati muli odzikuza pamachitidwe anu ndiye kuti izi zikuwonetsa kudzera m'mawu anu / zochita zanu kuti simukumufunikira kapena mukuchepetsa ulamuliro wake.. Kwa iye zingasonyeze kusayamikira kwanu ndi kuzindikira mikhalidwe yake ndi maluso ake.
• Anachita tchimo/osagwira ntchito za Fard – Mwina mukuchita tchimo lalikulu lomwe mwamuna wanu sakudziwa kapena sakudziwa, koma chilango ndi chakuti chingasokoneze ukwati wanu, makamaka ngati mkazi ali wachiwerewere. Mwinanso simukuchita zomwe mukufuna kuchita, mwachitsanzo. cholakwika, osawona hijab yoyenera kapena kuchita zinthu zosagwirizana ndi Chisilamu, nyimbo, gule, ndi zina.
• Kucheza/kutuluka kunja kwambiri – Mwamuna wanu sangakonde amene mumacheza nawo kapena kuti mumacheza nawo nthawi zambiri. Angaganize kuti mukupezerapo mwayi pa kulekerera kwake kapena kuti simupezeka pamene akufuna kuti mukhalepo.. Zimenezi zingachititse kuti iyeyo ndi banja lake asamasamale. Amuna ali ndi malingaliro a gheerah (kudzipatula/kukhala nazo) kotero angaganize kuti izi zikuphwanyidwa ngati mutuluka pafupipafupi.
• Kusakwaniritsa zokhumba zake – Mwina simukukwaniritsa zokhumba zake moyenera kapena mukukana kotheratu kutero. Izi zingayambitse kukhumudwa ndi mkwiyo, komanso chifukwa choti ayang'ane kwina.
• Kusamulola kukhala ndi nthawi yokwanira ndi ana/banja – Muli ndi vuto loti amathera nthawi yochuluka ndi ana kapena mumamuletsa kupeza ana (ngati olekanitsidwa), kapena simukufuna kuti azicheza ndi banja lake kapena munthu wina amene ali naye pafupi.
Awa ndi malingaliro ochepa chabe, pali zinanso zambiri zomwe zimakhala zapadera kwa banja lililonse. Izi sizikutanthauza kuti amuna ndi opanda cholakwa pazochitika izi, m'malo mwake ndi gawo lomvetsetsa chifukwa chake timawaimba mlandu. Nawonso akazi sayenera kuganiza kuti ndikokondera kwa amuna chifukwa kumangowonetsera mbali imodzi, ndi upangiri wamba kwa amayi onse kuti ayese kumvetsetsa mbali ina. Kupereka kuchokera kumbali ya mkazi kuyenera kukambidwa ngati nkhani yosiyana.
Akazi ayenera kukumbukira malangizo otsatirawa poyesa kuthetsa vuto. Mvetserani momwe mungathere kuti vuto ndi chiyani, vomerezani pomwe mwalakwitsa ngakhale zitakhala zovuta. Khalani ndi zolinga zenizeni zokondweretsa Allah ndi mwamuna wanu, kuchita zambiri nafl (salati yosankha), ndipo werengani mowirikiza ndi modzipereka pempherani kuti Allah swt akupatseni chipiriro ndi kuzindikira. Pempherani kuti Allah alumikizitsenso mitima yanu ndi kukuyandikitsani. Ngati mwamuna akadali wokwiya, kupatula kupempha thandizo, yesani kukumbutsa mwamuna wanu ma ayah awa powabwereza kapena kuwayika pamalo olemekezeka kuti aziwona pafupipafupi..
“Ndi kukhala nawo (akazi) m'njira yokongola. Ngati mwaipidwa nawo (ndiye dziwani) mwina simukonda china chake. M’menemo Allah walenga ubwino wochuluka”. (Surah An Nisa 4:19)
“Omwe amaletsa mkwiyo…Yemwe amakhululukira amuna… Ndithu Allah amakonda Al-Muhsinun (ochita zabwino) (Surah Al-Imran 3:134)
Ndikufuna kumva malingaliro anu pamutuwu. Chonde tumizani pansipa! 🙂
Mulungu asangalale nawo
Gwero : habibihalaqas.org
WL, Ili ndi gawo labwino kwambiri kwa Ummah wa Muslim, monga akunena Allah S.W.T m’buku lopatulika, “Fa Zakkir Fa Inna Zikira Tanfa'ul Mu'uminun. Zolemba bwino. Jazakillah bi Khair
Can u write something for the men posalemekeza mkazi ndi ma feelings plz
kukhala mkazi ndizovuta kwambiri!
Zikomo chifukwa cha chikumbutso.
Zochepetsetsa kwambiri ndipo ndazisunga kuti zidzachitike pambuyo pake!
:o)
Inde, Ine ndimangonena zimenezo. Kukhala mkazi ndikovuta kwambiri. Zikuwoneka kuti nthawi zonse ndi amayi omwe ali ndi zolakwa kapena chifukwa cha kugwa muukwati. Nthawi zonse pamakhala nkhani zambiri / maphunziro / mabuku okhudza momwe akazi amayenera kukhalira ndi amuna awo ndipo palibe mabuku omwe amauza amuna momwe ayenera kukhalira kapena ufulu wa amayi.. Sizikuwoneka bwino.
Ndimagwirizana ndi ndemanga ya Marya pamwambapa. Pali kulunjika kwakukulu pa zolakwa zomwe akazi amapanga kusiyana ndi zomwe amuna amapanga; ndizosavuta, ngati mkazi, kumva kuti akutsutsidwa ndi nkhani zamtunduwu. Ndawerenga ambiri a iwo (makamaka patsamba lino), ndipo amakhala ndi zofanana pang'ono pa gulu lonse.
Choyamba, wolembayo amatenga mtundu wina wa chidziwitso chonse cha zomwe amuna ndi akazi amafuna kuchokera m'banja – Chofunikira chachikulu cha amuna ndi 'ulemu', 'chifundo' cha akazi. Zomwe zimakupangitsani kuganiza kuti mkazi safunanso ulemu waukulu, kapena munthu kukoma mtima? Sindine wokwatiwa, koma ndikudziwa kuti mwamuna wanga akapanda kundilemekeza sindikuwona momwe banja lathu lingayendere… ndipo ndikukayika kuti moyo wathu pamodzi ukhoza kuyenda bwino ngati nditamuchitira iye mopanda chifundo kapena mopanda chifundo. Makhalidwe amenewa ndi ofunika kwa onse awiri!
Kachiwiri, mfundo imodzi m’nkhaniyo sinandisangalatse. Ambiri ndi achilungamo mokwanira – monga momwe mkazi sayenera kukwiyitsa mwamuna wake ndi kuchimwa, kumulepheretsa kukhala ndi nthawi yokwanira yocheza ndi banja lake, kumupangitsa kudziona kuti ndi wochepa (chifukwa chakudzikuza osati chifukwa chakuti ukhoza kukhala wopambana kuposa iye), kumupweteka iye, kuwononga ndalama zake ndi zina zotero. Chimene sindingathe kuchichirikiza ndi lingaliro ili lakuti kusakwaniritsa zokhumba zake kudzamtsogolera ‘kuyang’ana kwina’ ndi kunyenga – ndi kuti ichi chikanakhala cholakwa cha mkazi chifukwa sanamukhutiritse?! PALIBE chowiringula chochitira chinyengo. Mlandu sungaperekedwe pa wina aliyense kupatulapo amene akukhudzidwa. M'malo mwake ndimapeza malingaliro otere – zomwe zimadzudzula akazi pokakamiza amuna awo kuti azibera – zowopsyadi. Inde izi zimapita njira zonse ziwiri, ndipo ndithudi ayenera kuchita zonse zomwe angathe kuti akwaniritse zosowa za mwamuna wake (ndi mosemphanitsa), koma ndi kupanda chilungamo kwa iye kunena kuti ndi vuto lake ngati ali wosakhulupirika.
Ndamva kuti mwayankhapo za mbali imodzi ya nkhaniyi, zomwe ndingathe kuziyamikira – komabe, Ndikuona kuti pakufunika kuti pakhale nkhani zambiri zomwe zimayesa kupereka chithunzi chokwanira. Ndakulitsa chizoloŵezi chotsegula nkhani ngati ino ndi mantha, ndikudziwa zomwe ndipeza ndizakhala ndikudzudzula mkaziyo pamavuto ambiri m'banja. Koma wolembayo akufotokoza mfundo zina zomveka, choncho jazzakAllah khair pankhaniyi.
zilumba
RANT-ndikutanthauza izi m'njira zomanga kwambiri…amuna ayenera ulemu, koma akazi. pali nkhani zambiri zofalitsidwa patsamba lino zachisoni, kuwunikira “akazi opanda ulemu” kapena “akazi osamvera kapena kukwiyitsa mwamuna..” kwenikweni tsopano…nanga bwanji kuwerenga za china chosiyana kuti chisinthidwe. Pali akazi abwino kwambiri padziko lino lapansi omwe ali m'mabanja momwe mwamuna amachita zosemphana ndi zomwe ayenera kuchita., konda ndi KULEMEKEZA mkazi. ndikuganiza kuti zina zomwe zili m'nkhaniyi sizikugwira ntchito kwa mkazi aliyense i.e. si mwamuna aliyense amayembekeza kuti mkazi wake awaphikire kuti azisangalala…Umenewo ndi kugonana kwachikale. kutanthauza kuti akazi amachita izi (omwe akulangizidwa kuti asachite monga momwe tafotokozera pamwambapa) si Chisilamu. ndikuganiza zomwe zili pamwambazi zikugwira ntchito kwa amuna ndi akazi, ndipo munthu sayenera kuchita mwachitukuko potanthauza zina. ndikhulupilira kuti sindinakhumudwitse aliyense, m'malo mwake ndimangofuna kufotokoza malingaliro anga monga ofotokozera ena.
zilumba
🙂
Okondedwa Amuna, Simunganyoze mkazi wanu, atamaliza ntchito ndiye amayembekezera kuti amuchotsa…ndi kugwedeza chala chanu pa iye pamene inu kunyenga kunena “mudandikankhira ku izi” Nanga bwanji kuchitira anthu momwe mungafune kuti akuchitireni?? Mkazi wako si ngamila…simungamukwere pamene muona kuti n’koyenera. Nanga bwanji kwa tsiku limodzi, mukukhala mu nsapato zake. Kulimbana ndi maganizo anu, ndi ana anu, ndi nyumba yako…onani momwe zikumvera. Anthu ayenera kusiya kupatsa amuna tikiti ya njira imodzi kuti asatengere udindo pazochita zawo..ndi kubisala kumbuyo kwa mawuwo…”umamudziwa mwamuna wanga…ali ndi mkwiyo”. Mkwiyo? Kuyambira liti pamene kupsya mtima kunakukhululukirani zochita zanu? Tsiku lachiweruzo mudzaimirira pamaso pa Mbuye wanu ndi kunena, “Ndinali ndi mkwiyo”??? Ana okha ndi omwe amapsa mtima. ndi btw…Ndimakwiya ndikakhala ndi njala. Ndipo ndine mkazi. Tiyenera kukumbukira kuti mkwiyo umachokera kwa mdierekezi, ndipo sitiyenera kudzipereka mu izo! Onse Amuna ndi Akazi!!
Wokondedwa Wolemba, mfundo zabwino kwambiri.
Okondedwa owerenga, Ndikuganiza kuti ena a inu simuli pabanja kapena simunakwatirane kwa nthawi yayitali. Ndakhala m'banja pafupifupi pafupifupi 10 zaka Alhamdolillah ndipo pamene panali zochitika (oposa mmodzi) pomwe ndidamva ulemu wanga ukuponderezedwa – Nditha kunena motsimikiza kuti nthawi zambiri ndi amene ndimatsutsa kusalemekeza. M'malo mowona nkhaniyo ngati kuwukira, liwone ngati upangiri ndikusankha zomwe mukuwona kuti zikugwirizana ndi vuto lanu. nanga amuna?? chabwino, Taonani kuti iwo alibe mwayi kotero kuti wina akuwapatsa upangiri waukulu wokonza ma Akhirah awo. Inde ndi nkhani yowona, lemekezani mwamuna wanu osati chifukwa ndi mphatso ya Mulungu kwa anthu; koma chifukwa chakuti iwe ndiwe mtumiki wa Mulungu wothokoza. Ndipo mukuganiza ngati muchita chinthu chokondweretsa Mulungu?; Adzakusiyani osowa. Okondedwa anga, Ngati mumakonda Allah komanso ngati mumakonda wina chifukwa cha Allah; Mulungu amakukondani zolengedwa. Kodi pali phindu lalikulu.
ndikuwona alongo ambiri (makamaka amene sali pabanja) ndi ofunitsitsa kuyimira ufulu wawo. Habibtis inu simungapemphe maufulu abwino kuposa zomwe Allah wakusungirani. Allahu Akbar. Ngati wina sangakwaniritse zimenezo, Adzapeza chilango chaukali. Osayiwala, ngakhale Mtumiki wathu SAW adawapempha amuna kuti akhale abwino kwa akazi awo pa khutba yake yomaliza. Chifukwa chiyani tiyenera kukakamiza ufulu wathu pansi ena’ khosi. Kukwaniritsa maufulu awo, Yembekezerani malipiro kwa Mulungu ndipo Mulungu akonza zinthu zanu. CHIKONDI!
Subhan-Allah, WL… Sister Mariam zikomo kwambiri chifukwa choyankha mwachilungamo pankhaniyi kukhala mkazi! ndi malangizo anu kwa alongo achichepere pano. Inde zitha kumveka ngati zopanda chilungamo kwa alongo ena kuti akuyenera kuchita zambiri ndikumverabe gulu lawo, chifukwa chake sadzachichita. Koma zomwe akuwayiwala apa ndipo mudanena kuti ndi… Ndi Allah SWT amene adalamula akazi kuchita zonse zomwe zili m'nkhaniyo ndi zina. Komabe amuna ifenso tili ndi zambiri zoti tichite monga momwe Allah Ta’ala watiuzira komanso azilongo athu olemekezeka akumbukire., amunafe ndife ofooka ndipo tikusowa thandizo kuti titulutse zabwino mwa ife! Ndicho chifukwa chake amuna amati iye ndi theka langa labwino (ngati mwamunayo adadalitsidwa ndi chimodzi ndithudi, Ndikupempherera amuna onse kupeza theka labwinoko), ndiye alongo chonde samalani kuti mukhale theka labwino kuposa kukhala theka lowawa m'malo mwake!
Zikomo.
Bambo anga akhala akunyozetsa amayi anga kwa zaka 27 zapitazi, ndi 25 ndipo sindikumbukira tsiku lomwe bambo anga adamuchitira zabwino kwa 12-24hrs yonse! Zimandiwawa kwambiri kuona momwe amamulalatira komanso kumutukwana, Ndikumva kufunika kochita chinachake! Ndikudziwa kuti amakondana koma ndi wamwano kwambiri, osati kwa iye yekha komanso kwa ife tonse! Tsiku lililonse!pafupifupi konse kumwetulira pa nkhope yake! Mtima wanga ukusweka chifukwa cha iye! Ndipo nkhaniyi sithandiza kwambiri! Iye sakudziwa lingaliro la ulemu! Ndikanakonda wina akanawathandiza! Mulungu Ngodziwa bwino!
Allah akupatseni barkhat inshallah zikomo
Moni. Nthawi zonse ndikawona chidziwitso chilichonse chokhudza momwe mkazi amayenera kukhalira kwa mwamuna wake zomwe ndimawona kuti ndizokulirapo, Ndikuwona chinthu wamba pomwe alongo amalumphira kumbuyo kwa upangiri wabwino wotere ndikuyika ndemanga kuti 'bwanji alongo’ mu chitetezo. Palibe chifukwa chochitira izi popeza upangiri ngati uwu siwukira alongo. Nthawi zonse ndikapita ku Masjid (pafupipafupi) kapena dinani ulalo kapena kunyamula buku ndikupeza kuti ine nthawizonse kuphunzitsidwa kukhala mwamuna wabwino, kukhala chilungamo kwa mkazi wanga, momwe mungakhalire oleza mtima ndi akazi monga momwe alili zolengedwa zamaganizo, momwe ife tili atsogoleri a mabanja athu choncho udindo waukulu uli pa ife pa momwe banja limakhalira.. Mwamuna amavutika nazo ndipo nthawi zambiri amakhala atang'ambika ndipo samadziwa komwe angayang'anire, ndipo akakumana ndi nkhani ngati izi amawona chiyembekezo kuti palinso chitsogozo kwa alongo momwe akuyenera kukhalira.. Mukuwona ngati onse awiri aphunzira za udindo wawo kwa wina ndi mzake kuposa momwe zimakhalira kupambana; komabe ngati m’modzi wa m’banja angochita zimenezi ndiye kuti ndi ntchito yovuta kwambiri, Komanso sizithandiza anthu akamanyalanyaza malangizo abwino otere a sunnah – ngati izi zimachitika nthawi zambiri kuti zomwe zatsala za anthu, zikanabweretsa tsoka. Ndikamva nkhani zomwe zimandivuta kuzimeza, Ndimangosamala chifukwa ndizothandiza banja langa komanso ine ndekha, kotero osati kupanga ‘ tit kwa tat’ chonde ingosamalani. Pali zambiri zomwe mungachite ndi zomwe musachite kwa abale. Uku si kuukira chabe upangiri wachifundo. Moni
Ndizosangalatsa kuwona mlongo Mariam akupereka upangiri wopanda tsankho. JazakAllah