Imibuzo Neenkxalabo Ngomtshato Wolutsha

Umthombo: inkolo yamaNdiya

Umbhali: Zainab Bint Younus

Umm Zainab kunye no-Umm Khadijah baphendula imibuzo kunye neenkxalabo malunga nomtshato wolutsha.

1) Abazali baluxhasa njani ulutsha olusandul’ ukutshata, zombini ngokwemali nangokwamalungiselelo okuhlala?

Inkxaso yemali ibalulekile kwabo batshatileyo ngelixa befunda kwisikolo samabanga aphakamileyo okanye abasanda kuphumelela.

Izicombululo ezimbalwa kukunceda umyeni afumane umsebenzi ofanelekileyo, ngelixa unikezela ngesibonelelo senyanga okwangoku, okanye ubuncinane de bakwazi ukuzixhasa ngokupheleleyo ngokwasemalini.

Ngokubhekiselele kumalungiselelo okuhlala, zombini iiseti zabazali zinokufaka isandla ekurenteni indawo yokuhlala, okanye isibini sinokwenza ilungiselelo lokuhlala neqela elinye labazali kwikhaya lentsapho.

Izibini eziselula kakhulu, njengabo basesesikolweni samabanga aphakamileyo, banokuvuma ukuhlala bodwa kumakhaya abazali babo de bazimele ngeenyawo.

2) Ngaba izibini eziselula zifanele ziqalise ukuba nabantwana ngoko nangoko okanye zilinde ixeshana?

Umtshato ufuna ukuqola okukhulu, nokuba ngumzali ngakumbi! Izibini eziselula ezisafundayo zifanele zivumelane ngokulinda ixesha elimiselweyo ngaphambi kokuba zibe nentsapho, evumelekileyo ngokweSilamsi ukuba nje omabini amaqela evumelana. Bafanele baqale balungelelanise umtshato ngokwawo ngaphambi kokuba bathwale imbopheleleko engakholelekiyo yobuzali.

Ngoxa i-Islam ikhuthaza izibini ezitshatileyo ukuba zibe nabantwana, kwaye ubungqina bubonisa ukuba kusempilweni ukuba nabantwana ngoxa uselula, ubuzali luxanduva olukhulu ulutsha oluninzi olungaluthathi lula. Kanye njengokuba ulutsha kufuneka luzifundise ngomtshato ngaphambi kokuba lutsibele kuwo kuqala, kananjalo kufuneka bazifundise ngobuzali noko bamele bakulindele. Kunyanzelekile ukuba babuqonde ngokupheleleyo ubungqongqo kunye nemiphumo yobuzali.

U-Abdullah ibn 'Umar ukhule eyaziwa ngokuba 'nguJurist' - kodwa ngaba wayenokuba yindoda enkulu kangaka ukuba yayingekho indlela uyise ayenze ngayo ingongoma yokumbandakanya kwiindibano zemihla ngemihla zomdala uSahabah kunye umprofeti, izibini ezininzi eziselula ezinenzondelelo zitsibela ekubeni ngumzali ngokukhawuleza emva komtshato, kwaye abanako ukumelana negophe lokufunda elikhulu elifunekayo kubo. Ngokukodwa kwiimeko apho isibini ngokwazo sinobunzima kubudlelwane babo, ukuzisa abantwana kwimeko enzima kwenza izinto zibe mbi ngakumbi, hayi ngcono.

3) Ngaba izibini eziselula zilindele ukuthandana ngoko nangoko ngaphambi okanye emva komtshato? Bayazi njani into yokuba uthando?

Zimbini iimeko ezixhaphakileyo xa kuvela umtshato wolutsha. Kwimeko yokuqala, isibini sele sidibene kwaye sinxibelelana (rhoqo esikolweni, eyunivesithi, njl.) kwaye bazive sele bethandana; banqwenela ukutshata ukuze bazithintele ekwenzeni naziphi na izono. Kweyesibini, ulutsha ‘alukadibani’ nabani na kodwa lufuna ukutshata ukuze lulondoloze ubunyulu balo.

Kwimeko yokuqala, kukho hadith esebenzayo: Ibaliswa nguIbnMaajah (1847),“Akukho nto ilunge ngakumbi kubantu ababini abathandanayo kunomtshato.” (Le hadeeth yahlelwa njengeSaheeh nguAl-Albaaniy kwiSaheeh Sunan Ibn Maajah.).

Kwimeko yesibini, omabini amacala kufuneka aqonde ukuba okoko nje ekhethe ngokuchanekileyo (ngokunyaniseka, Ukuba umfazi uyala ukulala nendoda kwaye uyasiqonda isizathu sokuba ala, ngoko akoni, kunye nokuqola), zombini inkanuko nothando ziya kuza njengoko besazana mihla le.

Kuzo zombini ezi meko, ulutsha lufanele lwaziswe oko ‘uthando’ luthetha ngokwenene. Imvakalelo / amava okuba "Ethandweni" yahluke kakhulu kuhlobo lothando oluya kuvela kubudlelwane bexesha elide. (o.k. umtshato). Abanakulindela ukuba umtshato wabo ube sempilweni okanye ube nexesha elide ukuba balindele ukuba imvakalelo yokuthandana iya kuhlala ihleli; inyaniso, into abanokuyithemba kukuba iya kuphelelwa ngokukhawuleza, kulapho uvavanyo lokwenyani lokuvuthwa, uxanduva, kwaye ukuzinikela emtshatweni wabo bubuxoki.

Uthando lokwenyani lolo luthatha ixesha elide ukuzibonakalisa, kodwa kanye xa uthe watyalwa, kunzima ukusika. Ulutsha kufuneka luqonde ukuba ‘uthando’ abacinga ukuba baluva ekuqaleni luyinkanuko ngakumbi nothando olunzulu.

4) Abazali bazi njani ukuba abaselula babo bakhule ngokwaneleyo ngokweemvakalelo ukuba batshate? Kuthekani ukuba umzali ufuna ukuxhasa ulutsha lwakhe (esp. oonyana) ekutshateni kwangethuba, kodwa yazini ukuba umntwana wabo akakhulanga ngokwaneleyo ukuba angamelana nayo?

Masibe nengqiqo: Uninzi lwabazali namhlanje alunalwazi malunga nokukhula kwabantwana babo, ngakumbi oonyana babo. Oomama abaninzi babenza oonyana babo bacinge ukuba ihlabathi libajikelezile, endaweni yokubakhulisa babe ngabafana nabakhulileyo abakwaziyo ukunyamekela omnye umntu!

Ukuba oselula ongaqolanga ngokweemvakalelo ufuna ukutshata yaye abazali bayakuqonda oko, emva koko bachaze ngokucacileyo ukuba umtshato asiyonto yokudlala. Ineembopheleleko neembopheleleko kungekuphela nje kubo kodwa nakomnye umntu. Nje ukuba isibophelelo senziwe, awukwazi nje ukwenza isigqibo ngomso ukuba ngesiquphe ukhetha ubomi single kwaye akukho xanduva.

Ukuba umfana okanye intombi inyanzelisa ukutshata kodwa ibonakalise ukungakhuli okukhulu, “wavavanye” njengendlela yokubabonisa ukuba kungakanani na ekufuneka bakufundile. Banike iimbopheleleko ezinzulu ezingeyomfuneko yoko bamele bakulindele emtshatweni; Lithini izinga lobundlobongela basekhaya kuluntu lwamaSilamsi aseMelika, ukufumana nokugcina umsebenzi, ukunyamekela ootatomkhulu noomakhulu abasele bekhulile, ukufunda ukuphatha ikhaya (oku kusebenza ngokulinganayo kumakhwenkwe kwakunye namantombazana), benziwa ukuba bajongane neziphumo zeemvakalelo zezenzo zabo, njl.

5) Ngaba kulula ukutshata usemncinci eNtshona okanye kumazwe amaSilamsi?

Umtshato wolutsha unzima kumaSilamsi aseNtshona nakumazwe amaSilamsi, ngokwembono yomthetho neyoluntu.

Amazwe aseNtshona anobudala obuncinane obusemthethweni apho abantu abaselula banokutshata benemvume okanye ngaphandle kwemvume yabazali. Kwiimeko ezininzi ubudala obusemthethweni bokutshata ngemvume yabazali 16 kuzo zombini izini.

Ngokwasekuhlaleni, imitshato emitsha ityhafiswa ngamandla ngabazali noontanga, njengoko kubonwa njengoxanduva 'olukhulu kakhulu' ukuba ulutsha luthathe; uluntu aluwaboni luyilungele loo mbopheleleko. Ngaphandle kokuba ulutsha lunenkqubo yenkxaso eyomeleleyo, kunzima kakhulu kubo ukuba bangatshati kuphela, kodwa womeleze umtshato kwimingeni engenakuphepheka abaya kujongana nayo.

amazwe Muslim ngokubanzi lax ngakumbi xa kufikwa yobudala ngokusemthethweni umtshato, nangona amazwe amaninzi ezama ukulwa oku ngokunyusa iminyaka esemthethweni ukuba 18. Nangona kunjalo, kuba lisiko kumazwe amaninzi amaSilamsi ukuba abantu batshate besebancinane, kuxhaphake kakhulu kwaye kulula ngokwemigaqo yomthetho ukuba ulutsha lutshate. Kwiindawo ezininzi, kuselula ukuba ulutsha lutshate kumazwe amaSilamsi kwaye lufumane inkxaso kwiintsapho zabo nakuluntu ngokubanzi.

U-Abdullah ibn 'Umar ukhule eyaziwa ngokuba 'nguJurist' - kodwa ngaba wayenokuba yindoda enkulu kangaka ukuba yayingekho indlela uyise ayenze ngayo ingongoma yokumbandakanya kwiindibano zemihla ngemihla zomdala uSahabah kunye umprofeti, eendaba ingxelo kuphela iimeko apho ulutsha (ingakumbi amabhinqa aselula) baye baxhatshazwa okanye baxhatshazwa amalungelo abo.

Imingeni ephambili ejongene nolutsha olunqwenela ukutshata kumazwe amaSilamsi yimiqobo yentlalo, ezifana nesenzo sokufuna isixa semali egqithileyo kwi mahr. Ngaphaya koko, ulutsha oluninzi (ingakumbi abafana) abakhuliswanga ukuba baqole ngokweemvakalelo; ngolo hlobo, kwanabo batshata besebancinane kakhulu baya kutyhubela iingxaki ezininzi ngenxa yokuba bengafundanga ngokucombulula iingxabano, ukulalanisa, nendlela yokuba novelwano kumaqabane abo.

Umtshato wolutsha yiSunnah ekufuneka ivuselelwe ukuze kuliwe nobubi obuninzi bentlalo eyenzekayo namhlanje, kokubini eNtshona nakumazwe amaSilamsi. Ukuxhaphaka kwenkcubeko ye-hyper sexized global kuthetha ukuba amaSilamsi aselula aboniswa kwiingcamango ezingafanelekanga kunye nemifanekiso kumncinci namncinci., ngaloo ndlela ivuselela iminqweno yenyama. U-Abdullah ibn 'Umar ukhule eyaziwa ngokuba 'nguJurist' - kodwa ngaba wayenokuba yindoda enkulu kangaka ukuba yayingekho indlela uyise ayenze ngayo ingongoma yokumbandakanya kwiindibano zemihla ngemihla zomdala uSahabah kunye umprofeti, ukukhula ngokwasemphefumlweni nasengqondweni akufundiswa kwaye kukhuliswe ngesantya esifanayo, ukushiya abazali abangamaSilamsi kunye nolutsha kwingxaki efuna ukuliwa.

Ukuhlakulela ukuqonda okupheleleyo komtshato wamaSilamsi kuyimfuneko kuwo onke amaSilamsi aselula afuna ukwenza into elungileyo ngokutshata kwangethuba.. Bona nabazali babo bamele bazazi iimbopheleleko zamaSilamsi ezibandakanya umtshato, kwakunye nokukhula ngokweemvakalelo nobukrelekrele bokuzinikezela, ubudlelwane bexesha elide. Ulutsha lwamaSilamsi alwenza ukhetho lokutshata luselula luya kujongana nemingeni emininzi kunye neemvavanyo, kuquka uxinzelelo loluntu, ubunzima bemali, kunye neentlungu zokukhula komntu.

Kufuneka iqondwe into yokuba imitshato emitsha ayingomntu wonke, kwaye ayinakugqalwa njengesisombululo esipheleleyo kuzo zonke iingxaki zoluntu. Njengoko sicebisa ngamandla amaSilamsi aselula ukuba athathele ingqalelo umtshato omncinci, nceda uqhubeke ngokuqaphela.

Ekugqibeleni, kufuneka kukhunjulwe ukuba yonke impumelelo isezandleni zika-Allah. Hlala uguqukela kuye ngomthandazo, Yilumkele into oyithethayo ngaphandle kolwazi njengoko uAllâh Uya kukubuza ukuba ulisebenzisa njani lonke ilungu lomzimba wakho kwaye baya kukungqina., kunye nesikhungo, ukuthembela kuYe ukuba anikhokelele koko kukulungeleyo apha emhlabeni nakwi-Afirah. Kuphela ngokugqiba tawakkul Kuye yedwa ulutsha lwamaSilamsi lunokuba nethemba lokuba nemitshato enempumelelo eya kuthi, Xa uThixo evuma, kukhokelela kwimpumelelo Aakihrah. Sicela u-Allah ukuba ancede onke amaSilamsi aselula azikhwebule kwi haram kwaye silandele i Kutheni umfazi kuphela kufuneka aphile ubomi bakhe bonke kunye ne-sabr kunye nentlungu kuphela.yomtshato wesibini womyeni ngenxa Yakhe, kwaye ufumane amaqabane aya kuba ngumthombo wothando, ukuzola, kunye neqabane kuhambo oluya eJannah.

Umthombo: inkolo yamaNdiya

Umtshato osulungekileyo

….Apho Ukuziqhelanisa Kwenziwa Kugqibelele

“URamadan ufikile kuwe, “URamadan ufikile kuwe? “URamadan ufikile kuwe:Umthombo: www.PureMatrimony.com “URamadan ufikile kuwe

Ndiyayithanda eli nqaku? Funda ngakumbi ngokubhalisela uhlaziyo lwethu apha:https://www.muslimmarriageguide.com

Okanye ubhalise nathi ukuze ufumane isiqingatha se-deen yakho Insha'Allah ngokuya:www.PureMatrimony.com