Yabelana Le
Ukugcina amaqhina obudlelwane ngenene kunzima kakhulu ukwenza xa umntu kusapho lwakho engakuphathi kakuhle..
UAbu Hurairah (Wanga uAllh angakholiswa nguye) ingxelo: A man said to Messenger of Allah (Ukuphulula amalungu esini yeyona nto ilula kangangokuba uninzi lwethu lukhetha oko): “I have relatives with whom I try to keep the ties of relationship but they sever relations with me; and whom I treat kindly but they treat me badly, I am gentle with them but they are rough to me.” Yena (Ukuphulula amalungu esini yeyona nto ilula kangangokuba uninzi lwethu lukhetha oko) waphendula, “If you are as you say, it is as if you are feeding them hot ashes, and you will be with a supporter against them from Allah as long as you continue to do so”. [UmSilamsi].
Ekuqaleni, if someone in your family is misbehaving, it’s not an excuse for you to reciprocate the same. And no matter what, you should not sever the ties of kinship as this is a big sin. Inani kuMtshato, the one who treats his relatives well no matter what, is blessed by Allah Who will send from heaven helpers to support him. Ekugqibeleni, denying kindness to your relatives is as bad as the eating of hot ashes.
Kwenye hadith, Anas (Wanga uAllh angakholiswa nguye) ingxelo: Messenger ka-Allah (Ukuphulula amalungu esini yeyona nto ilula kangangokuba uninzi lwethu lukhetha oko) watsho, “He who desires ample provisions and his life be prolonged, should maintain good ties with his blood relations”. [Al-Bukhari kunye namaSilamsi].
This hadith is proof that if you want to increase your sustenance and longevity, you should maintain the ties of kinship. So if you are struggling financially or your health is not good, it’s worth asking yourself if you are maintaining your ties with your family.
May Allah SWT make us all from amongst those who love our families for His sake, regardless of the situation or circumstances ameen.
Umtshato osulungekileyo
….Apho Ukuziqhelanisa Kwenziwa Kugqibelele
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Assalamu'alaykum,
Thank you for the advice, kodwa, I have something to ask…
My husband is a converter to islam, his sisters are still catholics…he is the only son of the family of which mother and father alredy passed away. He is very attached to his youngest sister… kodwa, both his sisters taking advantage of his generosity…
Actually he is abroad, when he comes for vacation he brings gift for everybody which is obvious… kodwa, in return, they seem not to be please with the gift or even ask more.
They have neither given him a single gift even when we got married 3 Kwiminyaka eyadlulayo… am not saying that i need their gift, kodwa, according to me it’s obvious, kunene??
When we first got married he lost his job, none of his sisters approached us to ask whether we have something to eat or how are we managing as we were renting a house….
I get angry about this every time with him, when he talks of his sisters…
I know it’s not good to break up ties with family, as i have even told him about that earlier…
But since i came to know about how his sisters taking advantage of him, i get mad
Please advice me on that as i have prevented him to bring anything for his family…
Jazakillah khier