Nuduhake Iki
Apa Kita Urip kanggo Gusti Allah utawa Kanggo Nikah?
“Marriage isn’t all that we live for, though it is the corner stone of an Islamic society. The business of marriage is part of life’s journey, not the reason why we live. As Muslimoon we have to live for Allah and we have to indulge in remembering Him often.” Commentator Mohummud Yaaseen made the above thought provoking statement. The entire comment written by Mohummud Yaaseen was so profound that I thought it warranted a post of its own. Mohummud Yaaseen stated the following:
“Assalaamu allaykum Ladies
I really think that what sometimes makes marriages unhappy, (any marriages, polygamous or monogamous) is a total and utter focus on the marriage itself.
Marriage isn’t all that we live for, though it is the corner stone of an Islamic society. The business of marriage is part of life’s journey, not the reason why we live. As Muslimoon we have to live for Allah and we have to indulge in remembering Him often.
The sweetness of His Thikr is sweeter than the bonds of your marriages. minangka ngandika, that Indeed in the remembrance of Allah to hearts find contentment”
Kanjeng Nabi (S.A.W) Aku rumangsa rada bingung kepiye carane bisa ngevaluasi apa aku nggedhekake anak-anakku kanthi becik lan apa maneh sing kudu ditindakake utawa ora.You are not a true believer unless you love for your brother what you love for yourself” This you should remember when it comes to your sisters in Islam .If you know your husband is a good man, and that perhaps, your co wife also loves him as you love him, and that he also loves them and has to deal fairly with them in order for him to also reach Paradise (Jannah) then you should try and make it easy for him and not difficult. Do you love your husbands enough to want Jannah for them? Do you love your sisters enough to want Jannah for them also? Do you want Jannah for yourself?
Be better than hateful towards your sister wives because the chances that they will also be hateful towards you are equally great. Which wife do you think is more preferred to your husband, the one that is continuously complaining and being hateful, or the one with whom he finds peace and tranquility? Be the peaceful one, and perhaps the other wives will learn to be peaceful, even if out of mere competition.
Eling, live your life for God, not for anyone else, and be dutiful toward Him and in fulfilling the rights that He has prescribed towards Himself and all of His creation, including your husbands and his other wives. Respect that just has you have rights over your husband so does his other wives. Respect also, that just has he has responsibilities to fulfill regarding you so does his other wives have similar needs.
And Allah knows best.”
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Sumber: http://polygamy411.com/2011/03/28/do-we-live-for-god-or-for-a-marriage/
MasyaAllah. So true.
Jazakallah.
Easier said than done. How does a first wife feels when husband lied and cheated in her and eventually married the woman he is cheating with? How not to feel hate and animosity towards them?
WL. Inggih, i truly enjoyed this article ,may Allah reward u. ya wis , it may not be easy 4 marriage to strive with conflicts and set backs from both spouses. But like my parents always says nothing good last 4 padha mung ngerti nalika samubarang inti, so also bad times does not stay wit us 4 padha mung ngerti nalika samubarang inti. If a marriage is having problem , let say a man cheating on hiz wife then later brought that woman home 4 palakrama . This is serious and major sin as the man has commited Zina . a major sin and no one but Allah can give best punishment for that.but us on the other end that was wrong must be patient and know that nothing happen except it has been decree be4 it happened and Allah does not do bad.if this bring sadness to us then we should know that Allah test and trail has started and we should be careful how we handle it. we should remember its a test and during a test , the teacher is always silent, not untill some time. And then We should beg Allah 4 guidance cause indeed not everything that is bad is bad 4 us and not everything that is good is good for us . sawetara mundhut ing barang :…and it may be that you dislike a thing while it is good for you, and it may be that you love a thing while it is evil for you, and Allah knows, while you do not know.(Q2:126). The first thing when something bad happen to us or something that brought us so much sadness …then we are to return to Allah subhana wataa la. ..for if indeed we reflect for everthing that happen,Put your trust in Allah, and always know that (good and bad) things happened for a good reason … , Allah alwys have a reasons and lesson that m ust be learnt . And we may miss that lesson Allah so much want to teach us when we forget that good or bad came from Him . Most of all we should know that the world and everthing in it are but a past time…we hav focus , aim , reason why Allah created us… never forget your duty to Allah. Never dedicate more energy in the things that will ultimately disappear. Focus in things that matter the most. Focus in the hereafter. Focus in Allah! . Allah iku luwih ngerti.