Romance in Ramadan…But Not If My Mother In Law Has Anything To Do With It!

So there I was minding my own business, when my mother in law dropped a bombshell on me: ‘You do realize it is haram for you to go to your husband during this month?'

My immediate reaction was ‘eh? I thought that was just while fasting?'

‘Not at all – the angels curse you during this month if you go to your husband.’ She continued.

Ok that was news to me. But as I never believed a word my mother in law ever said when it came to religion (different aqeedah – don’t ask!), I decided to knock that one on the head and do my own due diligence.

It turns out that this was the first of many weird and wonderful insights my in-laws had about Ramadan do’s and don’ts between husband and wife. All of them were admittedly, quite amusing. Some of them were not so.

I wasn’t the only one left in wonderment either. One of my closest friends told me her mother warned her she was not even allowed to sleep in the same bed as her husband, to which I burst out laughing.

But in reality, it’s no laughing matter. The truth is, there are so many misconceptions around the beautiful month of mercy that in all honesty, it makes my heart sink when I think about it. How many brothers and sisters are denied simple blessings because of what culture dictates?

Is Islam really so fickle that husband and wife can’t be trusted during this blessed month? Of course not!! Sisters from the Asian subcontinent in particular seem to get it the worst from what I have experienced.

All sorts of myths have arisen such as not being allowed to eat from the same plate or sharing the same glass during this month. I even met one sister who said that she was forced to sleep in a separate room because her in-laws frowned upon it.

ma wai e hora ki roto ki tona hapu me te hapori e tata ana ki a ia, many of these myths arise from ignorance – plain and simple. So it pains me to see that this is often touted as ‘normal’ when in actual fact it isn’t. There are many more examples (too many to think of!) that rely defy belief.

The truth is that intimacy during the hours of fasting is forbidden and that’s it. There are many things that couples need to know during Ramadan and I would say at this point if you want to learn more about what you can and can’t do and also what you can do as a couple to get even more reward, then make sure you register for the webinar ‘Romance in Ramadan’. Details are below!

Written by The Girl In The Black Hijaab.

Want to know more about Marital Intimacy in Ramadan? Then join Sheikh Musleh Khan in our webinar replay of Marital Intimacy During Ramadan. Click Here to watch this now.